Darkness Before Dawn

whisper honestly.
    He nods and pulls me tighter into his side, kissing the top of my head softly as we pull into the parking garage of our apartment.
    My hands feel clammy as I walk into the building, and suddenly I'm not so sure I want to be back here. What if Benny is watching us right now? I look skeptically at Bruce and Spencer as they walk on either side of us. I've spoken to Bruce about what happened that day a couple of times and although I know that none of it is his fault, I can't help not trusting him anymore. I cling on to Cole's arm a little tighter and he stops walking, looking down at me with questioning eyes.
    He snaps his head up. "Go ahead," he says to our security guards as we reach the elevators.
    "Sir, Spencer will go up first and check things out while I wait here with you," Bruce says as Cole waves his response off.
    "No, go ahead. I'll take her up by myself in the next one."
    Both men look at us with dumbfounded expressions before shrugging and muttering an "as you wish" and getting on.
    Cole turns his body to me. "Look at me," he says quietly, and I comply. "Everything is going to be fine."
    "I don't trust them," I whisper. "I don't want them watching me anymore."
    He frowns before shaking his head on an exhale. "Baby, we need the security," he says as he combs my hair away from my face. "If you want we can get new people, but you can't just parade around by yourself."
    I shake my head. "I'm not planning on it."
    His eyes soften as he regards me. "Good, because I don't think I can handle another blow to my heart."
    I sigh. "I guess we'll keep them for now, but I don't know, it just feels weird. Will Connor be around too?" I ask quietly.
    His face grows serious as he searches my eyes and takes both sides of my face in his hands. "Yeah, unless you don't want him to be? I trust him though, and I know you'll like him. He's really excited to have a cousin, you know? And if you don't feel safe with Bruce and Spencer, we'll get rid of them." I give him a small smile and he leans in to kiss me softly.
    "I want Connor around," I whisper quietly. Truth is, I get a good vibe from him, and he gives me an ounce of hope that maybe my family isn't all that bad.
    "Good," he replies with a nod as he tilts his head to search my face. "Now, let's go home, yeah?"
    "Yeah," I reply quietly, feeling a little less breathless, despite the lack of air in my lungs.
    The walk to our apartment is long, as I take my time, savoring each step of freedom that I take. Every step brings me closer to our home together, our life together, the life I've been missing for the past month. When we open the door, I see a fury of red hair bouncing toward me, making me gasp and take a step back.
    "Blakey!" she shrieks as she wraps her arms around me, her large, obviously pregnant midriff crashing against me. My breaths start coming in gasps as I wrap my own arms around her and begin to weep. I see a large figure from the corner of my eye before feeling Greg's big brown arms wrap around both Becky and me.
    "I missed you so fucking much," Becky says in between sobs.
    "We're so glad you're safe," Greg says above us.
    "Let the girl breathe!" Aubry shouts from behind us, making us step away from each other and chuckle as we wipe our tears.
    I fully take in Becky's short navy wrap around dress that hugs her body perfectly, and I can't stop my tears from running. Despite my broken heart, I step forward and place my hands on her pregnant belly. A soft sob escapes her as she places her own hands above mine.
    "I heard. I'm so sorry, babe," she whispers.
    Once I'm sure the knot in my throat will let me speak, I clear my throat. "I'm so happy for you," I say quietly. And despite the sadness I feel about my own lost pregnancy, I am happy for them. They tried to get pregnant for so long, and I know it's unfair for me to feel the pang that I feel in my chest. I turn to Greg and smile at him. "Congratulations, Gregory."
    His mouth turns up slightly before he steps forward and wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head. "I love you, Cowboy. I'm sorry for your loss. I missed you so much." I feel new tears sting my eyes before I rapidly blink them away. I will not cry anymore, dammit!
    Cole walks over and hugs Becky and Greg before putting an arm over my shoulder and pulling me into him. "You hungry, baby? Becky stocked our fridge."
    "I wanna shower first, is that okay?" I ask, looking from face to face.
    "Of course, we're not going anywhere!"