Eversea A Love Story

whispered. Yes. I was proud of myself, because what I really wanted to do was throw myself into his arms and beg him to tell me it was all a nightmare, that he wasn’t leaving, that Audrey wasn’t pregnant, and that what we’d had was real.
    Jack’s eyes got hard. “How dare I? What the fuck does that mean? I wasn’t the one letting some stranger stick his tongue down my throat.” He leaned in toward me, pushing against my hand, his beautiful Jack scent polluted by the sickly sweet smell of whiskey. “Who are you? Coz I sure as shit don’t recognize you. Is this how you spend your weekends, dressed like a hooker, picking up strange guys in bars? Was sweet, innocent, virginal Keri Ann some kind of—”
    My hand connected hard against his face, the slap reverberating around the small room. I was shaking with fury.
    To his credit, his head listed a bit to the side, but he didn’t grab his cheek. He just stopped and dropped his head, not meeting my eyes. Then, he slowly reached for my stinging hand and placed it back in the center of his chest where I’d had it seconds ago. He covered it with his own.
    I swallowed, trying to ignore the feeling of my hand in his and the way he was pressing it so hard into his chest it was like he was trying to push it through to his heart. I hung onto my indignation by a thread. “Was that my appeal, then? The sweet virgin who would make you feel like a man?”
    For a split-second, I debated lying and telling him he was right. That it was all an act he fell for. I could look on him with pity and pretend I didn’t care. But I wasn’t a liar. Jazz always said I sucked at it.
    “God, no.” Jack said, his voice sounding strangely strangled. He raised his eyes to mine. “Sorry ... I’m so sorry.”
    “What for, exactly? Or should I say, which part?”
    “For it all.”
    No. Not that. Please don’t be sorry for everything. Just the part where you forgot to tell me you may have impregnated your girlfriend and that it obviously wasn’t as over as you had intimated. Please, just the part where you leave me, not the rest of it.
    “All of it?” I whispered.
    “God, Keri Ann, what do you want me to say? I’m sorry I’m so fucked up I sold my life, my soul, and my future to the devil?”
    His hand left mine, and he pressed it palm down in the center of my chest. “If I’d known you were in my future, I would have chosen differently.”
    His skin was hot against mine, and we both stood, each of us pressing a hand on the other’s heart. It could have been ridiculous and childish if it hadn’t been so Goddamn tragic. Not he may have chosen differently, he would have chosen differently.
    I hung onto his words like a life raft. I felt a tear slide out of the corner of my eye. No! I would not cry now.
    Jack stepped forward, our arms folding up to allow his advance, and I held my breath as his face came close to mine. His breath was cold where it touched my wet cheek, and then his warm tongue and lips were on my skin just like when we’d made love. I gritted my teeth against the onslaught of emotion the tender move caused, but my breathing hitched, giving me away. I gave in and turned my face, meeting his lips with mine. They were salty from my tears, tangy from whiskey, and hungry for me. The taste of bittersweet.
    I accepted the slide of his tongue and returned it, pouring into my kiss words I would never say. I took his beautiful soft hair in my hands, trying to capture the memory of it, and then slid them down his muscled back, memorizing every nuance. Finally, breaking my mouth away from his, I pressed my face to his neck and kissed his throat. My mouth moved over the Adams apple I had been so focused on the night he had almost kissed me. I tasted his skin and heard and felt the vibration of his groan beneath my mouth. And I inhaled the scent from his skin, deeply.
    Then I brought my mouth close to his ear. “If you had chosen differently, you would have never found me,” I whispered. That was the worst irony of all. And there was only one thing to do.
    “Good bye, Jack,” I said and stepped sideways out of his arms.
    Jack watched me, wordlessly. I eased open the door and slid through the opening into the arms of Joey, who had obviously been waiting for me.
    One last look saw Jack closing his eyes and sinking to his knees before Joey took the door and closed it behind me.
     

 
    T H I R T Y – F O U R
    I couldn’t believe it was possible to wake up and feel any