Revived (Cat Patrick)

removes her arm from her eyes and looks over at me, squinting at first. When her eyes adjust to the brightness, her gaze sharpens. “Look at me.”
    I do.
    “I’m not afraid, Daisy.”
    You should be , I think but don’t say. In my experience, dying isn’t all that great.
    “That’s good,” I reply, because I have no idea what else to say.
    “No, seriously, it is good. I mean, it’s not good that I have cancer. When I first found out, I felt so cheated. I was convinced there was some way to fight it.”
    “You can,” I say with borrowed confidence. “You should still be thinking that way.”
    “That’s the thing, Daisy: No, I shouldn’t,” Audrey says. “At some point, you have to realize that death is coming and be grateful for what you’ve had instead of pissed that it’s going away.”
    “But you’re barely eighteen,” I protest. “That’s pretty young to give up.”
    “I’m not giving up,” Audrey says. “I’m accepting my fate.”
    “That’s weak,” I mutter under my breath. I’m angry at Audrey, and I’m angry at myself for feeling this way. I wonder what I’m trying to accomplish by arguing with her. Do I want her to be as upset about her cancer as I am?
    I wish I could rewind a few hours and laugh with her again. Instead, I’m mute, and Audrey looks away from me and flops her arm back over her eyes.
    “Actually, I think that letting go is pretty strong, Daisy,” she says. “Everyone has to go sometime. Maybe this is my time.”
    I shake my head at her, annoyed at her calmness. Then I wonder, What if it was me? Mason told me he had problems bringing me back last time; if I was in Audrey’s flip-flops, would I be this Zen?
    Doubtful.
    “How long are we staying?” I ask, changing the subject. “I’m getting burned.”
    “You’re clock-watching,” Audrey teases, putting me more at ease after the tense conversation. “You know Matt will be home from school soon.”
    I simultaneously roll my eyes and shake my head at my friend, but inside I know that she’s right.
    And maybe about more than just Matt.

seventeen
    Matt must have rushed out of school after the 2:50 bell, because he walks in the house at 3:07. Of course he doesn’t look hurried; he’s laid back, as usual.
    “Hi!” I say—perhaps a touch too enthusiastically—when he comes into the living room, where Audrey and I are zoned out on an afternoon talk show. I try to control myself, but I’m sure the look on my face is pure sap. Before he arrived, I was in a vegetative state; now, as he strides across the room, I’m buzzing.
    “Hey,” Matt says, smiling at me. “Hey, Aud,” he says to his sister with a slight wave. He drops his book bag on the floor and falls into the squishy chair. He scrunches up his dark eyebrows as he looks at the TV. Teens are confronting their parents about the adults’ bad habits, like smoking, doing drugs, and dating twenty-year-olds.
    “What are you watching ?” Matt asks.
    “Quality TV,” Audrey murmurs. “Watch for five minutes and you won’t be able to look away.”
    Mrs. McKean comes into the room wearing one of those mom sweat suits that works for the gym or the grocery store. She’s rubbing her hands together like she just put on lotion; I can smell its lemony scent.
    “Audrey, did you forget about your appointment?” she asks.
    “Huh?” Audrey says, struggling but finally pulling her eyes away from the on-screen train wreck to look at her mom.
    “You have a checkup at four, and we need to leave at three thirty to get there on time,” Mrs. McKean says. She glances at the time on the DVR before looking at me. “Daisy, we can drop you off on the way if you’d like.”
    “I’ll take her,” Matt says, his eyes still on the TV. I hold my breath.
    “Great, thanks, Mattie,” his mom says. “Audrey, please go get dressed.”
    Audrey looks down at her outfit. At three in the afternoon, she’s in pajamas; that’s what she elected to put on after we went to the pool.
    “Fine,” she says. “But I feel great. I don’t know why we have to go today.”
    “You know Dr. Albright always wants to see you after a trip to the ER,” her mom says.
    Audrey rolls her eyes and stands. “I’ll call you later,” she says to me before leaving the room. Mrs. McKean follows her out. Matt stands up and turns off the TV.
    “Wanna go?” he asks.
    “Sure,” I say, a little bummed that he wants to get rid of me so quickly.
    I’m in my head the whole ride to my