A Malazan Book of the Fallen Collection 3

all there was to it. Damned charmed, and
you still can't believe it. Well, neither can we, all right?'
    Balm spat into the dust. 'Listen to you mewling on and
on. Sentimental tripe, all of it. I'm wondering who cursed
me so that I'm still stuck with all of you. Fiddler I can
understand. He's a Bridgeburner. And gods run when they
see a Bridgeburner. But you, you ain't nobody, and that's
what I don't get. In fact, if I did get it ...'
     
    Urb. He's as bad as the priest who disappeared. The once-priest,
what was his name again? What did he look like? Nothing like
Urb, that's for sure. But just as treacherous, treasonous, just as
rotten and vile as whatever his name was.
    He ain't my corporal no more, that's for sure. I want to kill
him ... oh gods, my head aches. My jaw ... my teeth all
loose.
    Captain says she needs more sergeants. Well, she can have
him, and whatever squad he ends up with has my prayers and
pity. That's for sure. Said there were spiders and maybe there
were and maybe I wasn't conscious so's I couldn't go crazy,
which maybe I woulda done, but that don't change one truth,
and that's for sure as sure can be that they crawled on me. All
over me – I can still feel where their little sticky pointy legs dug
into my skin. All over. Everywhere. And he just let 'em do it.
    Maybe captain's got a bottle of something. Maybe if I call her
over and talk real sweet, real sane and reasonable, maybe then
they'd untie me. I won't kill Urb. I promise. You can have him,
Captain. That's what I'll say. And she'll hesitate – I would –
but then nod – the idiot – and cut these ropes. And hand me a
bottle and I'll finish it. Finish it and everybody'll say, hey, it's all
right, then. She's back to normal.
    And that's when I'll go for his throat. With my teeth – no,
they're loose, can't use 'em for that. Find a knife, that's what I
have to do. Or a sword. I could trade the bottle for a sword.
I did it the other way round, didn't I? Half the bottle. I'll drink
the other half. Half a bottle, half a sword. A knife. Half a bottle
for a knife. Which I'll stick in his throat, then trade back, for the
other half of the bottle – if I'm quick that should work fine. I get
the knife and the whole bottle.
    But first, she should untie me. That's only fair.
    I'm fine, as everyone can see. Peaceful, thoughtful —
    'Sergeant?'
    'What is it, Urb?'
    'I think you still want to kill me.'
    'What makes you say that?'
    'The way you growl and gnash your teeth, I guess.'
    Not me, that's for sure.
    Oh, that's why my teeth still hurt so. I've made them even
looser with all that gnashing. Gods, I used to dream stuff like
this, my teeth all coming loose. The bastard punched me. No
different from that man who disappeared, what was his name
again?
     
    Flashwit levered her bulk further down in the soft bed her
weight had impressed in the sand. 'I wish,' she said.
    Mayfly pursed her lips, then adjusted the nose she'd had
broken more times than she could count. Moving it around
made clicking sounds that she found, for some reason,
vaguely satisfying. 'You wish what?'
    'I wish I knew things, I guess.'
    'What things?'
    'Well, listen to Bottle there. And Gesler, and Deadsmell.
They're smart. They talk about things and all that other
stuff. That's what I wish.'
    'Yeah, well, all those brains are goin' t'waste though,
ain't they?'
    'What do you mean?'
    Mayfly snorted. 'You and me, Flashwit, we're heavy
infantry, right? We plant our feet and we make the stand,
and it don't matter what it's for. None a that don't matter.'
    'But Bottle—'
    'Waste, Flashwit. They're soldiers, for Treach's sake. Soldiers. So who needs brains to soldier? They just get in the
way of soldierin' and it's no good things gettin' in the way.
They figure things out and that gives 'em opinions and
then maybe they don't want t'fight as much no more.'
    'Why wouldn't they want to fight no more 'cause of
'pinions?'
    'It's simple, Flashwit. Trust me. If soldiers thought too
much about what they're doin', they wouldn't fight no more.'
    'So how come I'm so tired, anyway, only I can't sleep?'
    'That's simple, too.'
    'It is?'
    'Yeah, an' it ain't the stars neither. We're waitin' for the
sun to come up. We all want to see that sun, because it was
looking like we'd never see it no more.'
    'Yeah.' A long contemplative silence, then, 'I wish.'
    'Now what do you wish?'
    'Only, that I was smart as you, Mayfly. You're so smart you
got no 'pinions and that's pretty smart an' it makes me wonder
if