Alien in the Family

altar—I’ll merely step aside and let a more appropriate man have you.”
    How Emily Post of them. I had no comment to this that wasn’t going to start us off into some kind of fight over things we weren’t going to allow to happen. Besides, I was more stuck on something else. “Royal family?”
    “I didn’t know!”
    “I know.” I had a thought. “I wonder if Barbara knows.”
    “I’m sure she does.”
    “No wonder she wanted Doreen to marry you.”
    “Like Doreen would enjoy having her hand burned any more than you would?”
    I managed to laugh. “No, but I’m sure Barbara wasn’t thinking about anything other than making a great match for her daughter.”
    He stroked the back of my neck. “You think I’m a good catch?” I could hear the fear lurking there, just hidden beneath the surface.
    I leaned my head against his. “Yes, Jeff. And not because you’re some royal scion or prodigal son or whatever. And not because you’re the head of Centaurion Field and pretty much run everything, either.”
    “Why then?”
    I nuzzled his ear. “Because you’re gorgeous, you’re smart, you’re funny, you’re built, and you’re a god in bed. And you’re mine.”
    He turned and kissed me. It was deep and strong, and his mouth controlled mine just like always. I felt worry slip away. I didn’t care about anything when he was kissing me other than hoping it wouldn’t stop and that we’d move to making love as fast as possible.
    On cue my phone rang. I sighed and dug through my purse to find it. “Hi, Mom, you’re up early.”
    “Your only child being the target for unfriendly alien attacks normally warrants rising before dawn.” My mother’s sarcasm knob went well past eleven, and it was on high already.
    “How’d you know?”
    “Charles called me.” I picked up the unstated comment that Mom wasn’t happy that Chuckie had called instead of me.
    “I was waiting for it to be a decent hour,” I lied quickly.
    Mom sighed. “Kitten, this isn’t something that we can afford to wait on. You can’t treat an alien invasion the way you’re treating your wedding.”
    “What is that supposed to mean?”
    She heaved an even bigger sigh. “Everything’s taking you and Jeff forever. At this point, I counsel running off to Vegas.”
    “I wouldn’t have thought you’d approve of that.”
    “Would have approved when Charles suggested it all those years ago, would approve at this moment because it’s getting ridiculous.” Chuckie had actually proposed to me twice in my life. I’d just been far too dense to realize it the first time. My density was becoming legendary. The worst part was that I still couldn’t catch when I was being dense, and my nearest and dearest still insisted on not sharing until it was far too late. “You haven’t even confirmed your bridesmaids yet.”
    “Um, I’m working on it.” I was. I wanted Amy and Sheila, my best girlfriends from high school, and Caroline, my sorority roommate, and Lorraine and Claudia. The issues were that three of them didn’t know I was marrying an alien, and I had no idea who should be the maid of honor. So I’d stalled the lying and that uncomfortable decision off by having them all sort of on hold. Pathetic, but a great example of my wedding planning skills so far. Growing up I’d spent a lot more time reading Ms. magazine than Modern Bride .
    “Work faster.”
    “Noted. Mom, our wedding plans aren’t really the issue of the hour. Okay, I mean, they are, but we have bigger issues.”
    “Like Jeff being a member of the royal family? Which means we have an entire contingent of exiled royalty here, which bloodline you happen to be marrying into. Your father’s thrilled, by the way.”
    I managed not to share that, so far as I could tell, he was the only one. “Other issues.” I was reaching, but I wanted off the wedding and royal family conversation train.
    “Like Reynolds being in charge,” Martini muttered.
    I leaped on that one. “Yeah, Mom, why did you put Chuckie in charge of Centaurion?”
    She barked a laugh. “Because I want the only C.I.A. big shot I can trust in charge. It helps that he’s brilliant, understands you intimately, and also understands the A-Cs perfectly.”
    I wondered if Martini could pick up emotions through the phone, and I also wondered what my mother’s were at this time. My parents loved Martini and felt he was a good match for me. But Mom had shoved me at Christopher and apparently was