Clouds and Rain

uncertainties; that he‟d never be able to be a hundred percent sure about what he shared with Gable. These last months they‟d grown so close, and yet he‟d never seen this coming.
    Flynn‟s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of hoofs. He knew it was Brenner; he could distinguish the nervous trampling of the big stallion without fail every time. By the time Gable had approached, he‟d slowed the horse down and seemed calm as he dismounted a few steps away.
    “You okay?”
    “Sure,” Flynn answered, trying to sound casual.
    “You didn‟t even say hello to Calley.”
    Flynn shrugged. “I didn‟t want to interrupt.”
    “You weren‟t,” Gable said curtly. “She was dropping off the groceries. I had to help her because she‟s really growing uncomfortable.”
    “Oh, you were helping her all right,” Flynn said, tapping Bridget‟s side so she moved and he could get up.
    Gable stayed near Brenner and Flynn thought that was enough of a sign that something wasn‟t quite right. He walked to T.C. and took his reins, but Gable stopped him.

    217

    Zahra Owens

    “What‟s wrong, Flynn?”
    “You need to ask?” Flynn said, turning away from Gable. This time, Gable put his hand on Flynn‟s shoulder to stop him. “You and Calley? I knew there was stuff you hadn‟t told me. Now I wish you had.”
    “I told you everything you needed to know,” Gable said hesitantly.
    “Then you don‟t give me enough credit.” Flynn tried to mount again and this time Gable didn‟t stop him. As soon as he felt the saddle underneath him and T.C. started dancing from one leg to the other, ready to run, he saw Gable‟s defeated look and stepped down again.
    Gable didn‟t say anything.
    “What exactly is your relationship with Calley?” Flynn spat out.
    “I told you. We‟re friends. We‟ve shared a lot over the past years.
    A lot of it bad.”
    “A bed?” Flynn said, still feeling the anger boil inside him.
    “No, never that,” Gable said calmly. “You know I don‟t sleep with women, Flynn.”
    “You were all over her.” As soon as he‟d said the words, Flynn realized he sounded like he was still in high school.
    “I was comforting her. Bill is never around and she‟s hormonal.
    She‟s feeling lonely and uncomfortable and insecure and she‟s tired and worn out. I‟ve never been more than a friend to her, Flynn. I‟ll admit I try to be a good friend to her, but there‟s no way I can ever repay her for all the things she‟s done for me over the years.”
    “You gave her your children. That should be enough.” By now Flynn felt tears stinging the back of his throat. He tried swallowing them away, but his throat was thick and dry.
    “They‟re not my children,” Gable repeated for the hundredth time. “They‟re hers and Bill‟s. The only people who know they‟re mine are Hunter and Grant, you and I and Bill and Calley, obviously.”
    “But they are yours,” Flynn said, barely louder than a whisper as he turned around, pretending to fix something on T.C.‟s saddle. “I want them to be yours.”

    218

    Clouds and Rain

    Flynn closed his eyes as he felt Gable‟s hand on his shoulder again and realized it felt comforting.
    “I‟m sorry you couldn‟t be the donor, Flynn. You know that, don‟t you? If it had been possible, then I would have let you father those children.”
    Flynn couldn‟t stop the tears. He turned around and flung himself into Gable‟s arms, hiding his face in the crook of his neck. Gable wrapped his arms around him and squeezed, slowly rocking him from side to side.
    “I wish through some freak of nature I would have been able to give you those kids, Gabe,” Flynn said once he thought he was able to speak again.
    “I never wanted them, Flynn. I‟ve never missed having kids.” Then something seemed to dawn on him. “But you do, don‟t you?” Flynn lifted his head but didn‟t dare look Gable in the eye. “Ironic then that you could probably get Calley pregnant sitting next to her, but I‟m shooting blanks.”
    Gable wiped the hair away from Flynn‟s face, but Flynn looked over Gable‟s shoulder into the distance. He wasn‟t ready for what he would be able to read in Gable‟s eyes.
    “I never thought you‟d take the test results so badly, Flynn,” Gable said softly. “I‟m sorry I didn‟t realize it was so important to you.
    I thought you were like me, that you‟d automatically concluded that since you‟d never marry a woman, kids wouldn‟t be