Consequences

believe you have earned the ability to do some shopping for yourself.”
    Claire’s first thought was that she didn’t want to be by herself. What if someone like Mr. Jackson approached? But then again, isn’t that what she had wanted since she arrived, to be out, away, alone forever? She would need to file these thoughts. Compartmentalize and think about them tomorrow.
    Tony was testing his theory. She needed to hear every word he said. The directives for this test were proving playful and exciting. Claire knew she could pass.

 
Life is not what it’s supposed to be. It’s what it is.
The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.
—Virginia Satir
     Chapter 10
    Standing at the rail of her balcony, Claire stared at the scene in front of her. The rays of moonlight illuminated the yard and tops of the trees, changing the familiar objects to unfamiliar colors. Under its brilliance, the trees appeared black and the grass silver. The multitude of stars glistened as she listened to the sounds of coyotes in the distance. This noise worried her. She thought about the smaller animals in the woods and hoped for their safety.
    The humid air caused her to perspire even though she wasn’t outside long. She could feel her hair stick to her neck and droplets roll down her back. Claire had received word that Mr. Rawlings wouldn’t be home until after ten, and she would dine alone. This was the third night in a row. Last night, he hadn’t come to her suite at all. The night before, it’d only been for a few minutes to touch base . Apparently, things have been extremely busy.
    The clock said 11:00 when she retreated to the balcony. She hadn’t seen him or received a message and wanted to do something—anything. Patience wasn’t a virtue she possessed in her old life. Now as she gazed at the countryside, she knew she was losing what little she had recently been forced to acquire. She was thinking about how even the air smelled warm when the door behind her opened. “Oh, hi, Tony, you startled me.”
    “I thought perhaps I would need to search for you again. Then I noticed the drapes.”
    “I didn’t know if you were coming tonight.”
    He indicated for her to come back inside. She complied. And he shut the door. “You didn’t get my message?”
    “I did. It is just later than normal.” Seeing him in the light, she realized he looked tired and thought how he rarely appeared anything but ideal. Things must really be rough with work. She wanted to talk to him about it, but in the past, he didn’t or wouldn’t try to explain things.
    “I came to let you know I need to fly to New York tomorrow. I have a business deal that apparently is going to fall apart if I don’t get personally involved.”
    “How long will you be gone?”
    “Damn it, Claire, I don’t know for sure.” He told her to come to him, and she did. He held her so close that she needed to look up to see his eyes. He lowered his face to her hair. With her head against his chest, she heard him sigh. “This has been a pain-in-the-ass deal. It has been in the pipeline for years. The time alone has cost me millions, what with research and analysis. Now it seems like everything is going to fall through.”
    Claire didn’t know anything about the deal. She did know that this was more than he’d disclosed to her at one time. She wanted to help, to make him feel better. She didn’t want to do anything because he owned her, but because she wanted to. As terrifying as Anthony Rawlings can be when he is strong and controlling, she didn’t like seeing him meek and worn down either. “Tony, is there anything I can do?”
    He moved her away to see her face. “Are you asking me? I don’t think that has happened before.”
    She leaned back into his chest. “I want to help you relax before this big meeting.” She stood on her toes and kissed his cheek and neck as her hands unfastened his belt and slacks. She pulled his hand and led him to the bed, and he sat. Claire knelt in front of him, and his hands held her face as she moved toward him.
    The entire night, Claire was in control. She did what she wanted, what she believed would help him. Her pace was slow and more thorough. Tony tended to move fast, rough, and hard. Claire moved steadily, softly, and completely. He’d told her exactly what he wanted and how he wanted it for over three months. She knew what he liked. The most surprising part to Claire was that he allowed it. He would sometimes