Cook the Books

our project was evidently still on.
    “Of course. I know I’ve been asking for a lot of your time lately. Maybe Adrianna is free? And Owen, of course? They might like to have dinner out.”
    “That’s a great idea,” I murmured as I glared at a photo of Josh in between two brunettes. “It’s really generous. But I just talked to Owen, and Ade is taking Patrick to some moms’ group tonight, and Owen is chained to the computer to look for a new job.”
    “He’s giving up on the seafood business?” Kyle asked. “Apparently. If he can find something better, which at this point could be almost anything.” I paused. “Your father can’t go with you?” I suggested tentatively.
    “My father is having dinner with someone else tonight.” He dropped the name of a very famous Food Network chef. I was duly impressed.
    “You weren’t invited?”
    “No, I wasn’t.” Kyle couldn’t hide his bitterness. “Anyway, I think I’ll go out and try this place by myself. If it’s worth it, then maybe you’ll come back with me another night?”
    “Definitely.”
    “Now, you sure I can’t lure you away from work? A little gumbo? Creole? Etouffée?”
    I had no appetite for anything but soothing ice cream right now. “Sorry. But another night, I promise. I’ll talk to you soon.”
    1 hung up and clicked back to Josh’s profile page. One of my favorite things about Facebook is being able to see what friends are doing. When Facebook offers me the fill-in-the-blank opportunity to tell people what I’m up to myself— Chloe followed by a space to enter whatever I like—I usually update my status by supplying silly things like “Chloe is considering buying a BeDazzler so she can stud all her clothes with rhinestones” or “Chloe is wondering why she has the theme from Superman running through her head.”
    Josh’s status had been updated twenty minutes earlier: “Josh is still missing her.”
    My cell rang again. I figured that Kyle was calling back to reel off more Cajun cooking terms and repeat his invitation to go out. I was wrong.
    “You picked up this time,” Josh said.
    “It was an accident.” I clicked off his profile and hit the Status Updates button, the one that let me know what all of my online friends were doing at that Facebook moment.
    “What are you doing right now?” he asked.
    “Looking through Facebook. Isn’t that exciting? My life is terribly scintillating. No wonder you moved to Hawaii.”
    “Don’t say that.”
    Both of us were silent, but I stared at the computer screen as Josh’s status update changed:
     
    Josh is on the phone with the most beautiful girl in the world.
     
    Josh is sorry. He made a huge mistake.
     
    Josh is outside a brown house in Brighton.
     
    Josh is walking up her back stairs.
     
    Josh is hoping against hope that she’ll let him inside.
     
    Josh is totally and completely in love.
     
    My hands started to shake. I walked slowly from the bedroom into the living room and looked down at the floor for a moment before lifting my head to the window on the back door. Josh waved his BlackBerry at me. I dropped my phone.
    Josh and I locked eyes, and I rushed forward and opened the door. It didn’t matter to me at all that I had on crummy clothes or that my hair was in a ratty ponytail or that I was wearing his old shirt—in a desperate attempt to feel close to him. He stepped inside, putting his body inches from mine, and shut the door behind him.
    Josh slid an arm around my waist and pulled me against him. “I love you,” he breathed. Everything became blurry as he slowly kissed me.
    I pulled back slightly. “I don’t love you,” I said, and then took his face in my hands and kissed him hard.
    “But I still love you,” he whispered, walking me backward toward the bedroom.
    “But I still don’t love you,” I whispered back, smiling and fumbling to pull off his shirt. “I don’t love you at all.”
     

NINETEEN
     
    A good hour later, I rolled onto my side while Josh held me in his arms and kissed my shoulder. It felt as if no time had passed since the last time we’d made love, but I was keenly aware that everything was different now.
    “Josh?”
    “Yeah, babe,” he said as he ran soft kisses across my skin.
    “What about Georgie?” I shut my eyes, waiting for his answer.
    “What do you mean?”
    I sighed and scooted away. “I know you’re together, Josh. You and Georgie.”
    Josh rolled me onto my back and laughed. “Have you