Down Home and Deadly

complained to Carly as I pulled on one black shoe and looked around for the other one. “If Jolene hadn’t pressured me, I wouldn’t go.”
    “Oh, who are you kidding?” Carly pitched me my other shoe from the closet. “I’m the one who should be complaining about being dragged along. You know what you always say about the murderer returning to the scene of the crime. You wouldn’t miss this , and you know it.”
    I ducked my head. “You know me too well. But I do feel sorry for Jolene. She’s kind of obnoxious , but she doesn’t know anyone in town , and she was once married to J.D.”
    “I feel sorry for her , too, I guess. But I could do it from a distance. Especially since most of my employees seem to be taking off to go.”
    “Most of your employees? Who besides Debbie?” I gave her a sheepish grin. “And me?”
    “ Marco .”
    “ Marco ?” That was a surprise.
    “Apparently Gail asked him to go with her. I think they kind of like each other, but they’re both too busy or too shy to do much about it.”
    “Wonder why Gail is going?” I’d understood she hadn’t been fond of J.D. when they worked together.
    “Gail’s a younger version of us, Jenna. Raised by a S outhern mama to do the right thing whether you want to or not. He was a coworker , and it’s the right thing to go to coworkers’ funerals.”
    “I wonder if any of his grandmother’s friends will be there . ”
    “They might. But with all the trouble he apparently gave her, they might not.”
    “But he did come to her funeral , ” I reminded her.
    “Yeah, probably just to see what he could get.” Once again my sister sounded cynical. “Are you almost ready?”
    “Yeah, Jolene wanted to pick us up here , but I convinced her to meet us at the funeral home. Wonder how Tom will do with the funeral?”
    “Oh, I think he can handle it. Assuming no one gets shot.” Carly referred to the last funeral we’d attended.
    “Don’t even think that!” I shuddered. “I just meant since he didn’t know J.D. And since at least one current girlfriend, and possibly two, along with the ex-wife will probably all attend. It could be awkward.”
    “Or it could be illuminating. Maybe someone will confess to his murder.”
    I shook my head. “Somehow I doubt that.”
    *****
    As soon as Carly and I entered the funeral home chapel, Jolene strutted toward us. In deference to the solemn occasion, she had on her black halter today with a black leather skirt and black boots that came up over her knees. Her snake tattoo matched her eye liner perfectly.
    “You’ve got to be kidding,” Carly hissed in my ear from behind.
    “Serious as a heart attack,” I murmured. “Just wait.” I’d tried to paint her a word picture of J.D.’s ex-wife, but obviously my description had fallen short of the reality.
    I introduced the two women , and Carly expressed polite condolences.
    Jolene slapped my arm with the back of her hand. “Girlfriend, didn’t you tell your sister that dying was the best thing Jimmy Dean ever did for me?”
    Carly’s eyes widened, but she didn’t say a word. She and Mama were both so blessed with knowing the right thing to say that I kind of felt better that Jolene left her speechless.
    Tom Le M ay, the funeral director, motioned Jolene toward the back. She waved at him and turned back to us. “When this is done, we need to go out and celebrate.”
    Again Carly didn’t utter a word. Not even an “It was nice meeting you.”
    When Jolene was gone, we found a seat halfway down the aisle , and Carly suddenly rediscovered her voice. “I can’t believe I let you talk me into this. That woman is crazy.”
    I shrugged. “She’s odd. But she’s honest. Sometimes that’s refreshing.”
    Carly’s face paled. “What do you mean by that?”
    I frowned. “I don’t mean anything by that. Why?”
    Before she could answer, a stir at the back of the small crowd drew our attention. Lisa, dressed in an elegant black dress and flanked by her parents , walked past Jolene as if she weren’t there. Lisa held a dainty handkerchief to her eyes, but Bob and Wilma looked grimly forward. Each held one of Lisa’s elbows, but she didn’t look heartbroken enough to faint. In fact, either her mascara was very waterproof or the handkerchief was a show. I saw no tears. They took a seat across the aisle from us, but they didn’t look our way.
    A murmured conversation behind us caused me to look back just as Tiffany and Ricky slid into