In Death 18 - Divided in Death

me, Eve. When you look at me, you don’t see the whole of me. Maybe I’ve preferred that.”
    She thought of Reva, of illusions, and a mockery of a marriage. Nothing could be further from what they were dealing with. Roarke had never lied, nor pretended to be something other than what he was. And she had seen him, right from the first moment.
    “You’re wrong, and you’re stupid.” There was more weariness than temper in the words, and as such struck him more forcefully. “I don’t know how to get through this. I can’t talk to you about it, because it just circles. I can’t talk to anyone else, because if I tell them what’s ripping at us, it makes them an accessory. You think I don’t see you?”
    She turned back, looked straight into his eyes. “I’m looking at you, and I see you. I know you’re capable of killing, and feeling justified, feeling right. I know that, and I’m still here. I don’t know what the hell to do, but I’m still here.”
    “If I wasn’t capable, I wouldn’t be who I am, what I am, where I am. Neither of us would be here, wrestling with this.”
    “Maybe not, but I’m too tired to wrestle. I have to go. I need to go.” She walked quickly to the door, wrenched it open. Then she shut her eyes. “Make it disappear. Fuck hypothetical. I take responsibility for what I say, what I do. Make it gone.”
    “Consider it done.”
    When she left him, he sat down at her desk in the quiet, and wished, with everything inside him, that he could make the rest of it vanish as easily.
    ———«»———«»———«»———
    Reva waylaid her on the way outside. “I don’t have time,” Eve said curtly and kept moving.
    “It’ll only take a minute. I want to apologize. I asked you to give it to me straight, and when you did, I didn’t handle it. I’m sorry, and I’m pissed off at myself for reacting the way I did.”
    “Forget it. Are you going to handle it now?”
    “Yeah, I’m going to handle it now. What do you need?”
    “I need you to think. Where he might go, what his next steps would be in a crisis. What’s he doing now besides trying to find a way out? Think it through, lay it out. Have it ready for me when I get back.”
    “You’ll have it. He’d have to work,” she called out as Eve streamed out the door. “His art wasn’t just a cover, it couldn’t have been. It’s his passion, his escape, his ego. He’d have to have a place to work.”
    “Good. Keep it up. I’ll be back.”
    “That was well-done.” Tokimoto stepped out of the parlor, into the foyer.
    “I hope so. I’m not doing so well otherwise.”
    “You need time to adjust, to grieve, to be angry. I hope you’ll feel able to talk to me when you need someone.”
    “I’ve been talking you black-and-blue so far.” She sighed. “Tokimoto, can I ask you something?”
    “Of course.”
    “Are you hitting on me?”
    He stiffened like a rod. “That would be inappropriate under the circumstances.”
    “Because I might still be married or because you’re not interested?”
    “Your marriage would hardly be a factor, considering. But you’re not in a state of mind where . . . An advance of a personal nature is clearly inappropriate while your emotions and your situation are in flux.”
    She found herself smiling, just a little. And found something opening inside her again, just a little. “You didn’t say you weren’t interested, so I’ll just say I don’t think I’d mind. If you worked up to hitting on me.”
    To test it out, she rose on her toes and touched her lips lightly to his. “No,” she said after a moment, “I don’t think I’d mind. Why don’t you think about it?”
    She was still smiling, just a little, as she started back upstairs.

Chapter 19
    Quinn Sparrow would live. He might, with several months of intensive therapy and treatments, walk again—if he had the same level of will and guts Reva Ewing had called upon to recover from her injuries.
    It was, to Eve’s mind, a solid kind of justice.
    He had broken bones, a fractured spine, and a concussion among other insults. He would require reconstructive surgery on his face.
    But he would live.
    Eve was glad to hear it.
    He was and would remain in Intensive Care for at least forty-eight hours. He was sedated, but Eve’s badge and some bullying got her through.
    She left Peabody posted at the door.
    He was either sleeping or zoned when she walked in. She was banking on the zoned and shut off his IV drip of