Love is Always Write Anthology Bonus Volume

into a spoon, with Jacob's softening cock nestled in the small of his back. Jacob kissed his ear and folded hairy arms over Daniel's chest. Daniel tugged on his arm hair playfully, skating over the surface of the deep joy that was welling up inside him. "Here's a grey hair, old man. And another one."
    "Who just turned forty-seven? You're two years older than me right now. Old man."
    "I'm ageless. A classic."
    "Like a Model T."
    Daniel laughed happily and clasped his arms over Jacob's to hug them around himself more tightly. "God, I love you."
    There was a pause. They didn't say it often. But Daniel felt the soft warmth of truth in it when Jacob said, "I love you too. And I'm ready for everyone to know it."
    "We've been fine for two decades, hon. You don't have to do anything different."
    "Maybe we've been fine. But I'm ready to do better."
    "You know I love you whether you ever put that picture on your desk or not."
    "I know." Jacob kissed his neck softly. "I do know that. I don't deserve you and I don't know what you see in me, but I know my screw-ups don't change it. You love me. But how can I stay safe in hiding when everyone else is standing up to be counted? I want you to be proud of me too."
    "God." Daniel tipped his head back so his cheek brushed Jacob's face. "You don't have to do anything different. You were in my sights from the moment you did that jitterbug across the deck, that first day on the Gageway ."
    Jacob sighed. "We were so damned young. I was dumb, you were gorgeous."
    "Shush." Daniel turned in his arms to kiss him. "I'm still gorgeous. And we're still young."
    "And I'm still dumb?"
    "I didn't say that. Did I say that? Unless you keep talking about how you don't deserve me because that is dumb." Daniel squirmed back into the spoon and pulled Jacob's arm close. "God, what kind of man are you? I just fucked you into the bed and you want to have a heart-to-heart chat? You're supposed to roll over and go to sleep. Don't you read the women's columns in Cosmopolitan? "
    "Why the hell would I read Cosmopolitan ? For that matter why do you?"
    "Cliff likes it. He reads it aloud to the whole office," Daniel muttered. "Get some rest, Trip. Because tomorrow is Sunday and we have the whole day together. And if you think this wore you out, just you wait till morning."
    "Big talker." But Jacob sighed and his body softened against Daniel's back.
    Ten minutes later Jacob was asleep, snoring softly as he had begun to do lately. But Daniel lay awake, wandering back in his mind to the big steel ship and the excitement and the fear and the deep blue waters of the Pacific. And when he finally slept, he found himself coming awake at the smallest sound outside. At the third awakening he gave it up as a bad job and eased out of Jacob's slack hold.
    In the dim kitchen, he put on the kettle and made tea. He wanted black, but he took the chamomile, because he'd promised Jacob to try it on his bad nights. The steam was fragrant and soothing, with the sweetness of honey in it. He held the cup, staring down into it, until it cooled enough to drink. Eventually he carried it to the living room and settled on the couch. Each small sip eased him. On the bookcase, the picture of him and Jacob sat waiting, for Jacob to follow through on Monday. Or not.
    On the mantle, among other framed photos, was a small black and white picture, a little creased around the edges, matted up big enough to frame. We both were young. And you, Jacob, were damned beautiful.
    ****
    Two days later
    Daniel put his lunch into his case Monday morning and checked through his portfolio for the D'Abrico account sketches. Jacob had risen an hour earlier, grabbed coffee and headed off to work. His kiss on Daniel's cheek had been swift but not perfunctory. After the door closed behind Jacob, Daniel had sat at the table, finishing his breakfast, sipping his coffee and not looking at the bookcase in the living room. Then he had cleaned up the kitchen and made his lunch, and now there was nothing left to do but head out that door. In fact he was damned close to being late for the art department meeting.
    Coward. He and Jacob had watched news coverage off and on throughout Sunday. They had talked about everything and anything, except this. Everything except whether Jacob was really going to follow through and stand up to his father.
    The idea made Daniel feel strange. Elated and sick to his stomach at the same time. How much worse must Jacob feel? Daniel could count