Mulch ado about nothing

no.“
    “Have you fallen out with her?“
    “I never fell in with her. Dating for a couple nights was her idea and it worked like she said it would. I’ve got to get a shower before dinner.”
    Jane trailed him upstairs. “Explain!“ she demanded.
    He was laughing at her as he sat down on the top step. “See, Kipsy had this theory. When guys of her type, the rebellious ones, see her out with a boring, clean-cut, straight-arrow guy like me, they can’t understand it and want to bring her back into the fold.“
    “Oh, yeah?“ Jane said. Where was this leading?
    “And when cheerleader types of girls see a guy like me with a freaky-looking girl, they want to save me from her. So Kipsy said. So we tried it out for a couple nights in a row. Went to places where there were both kinds of people. And it worked. I’ve been ‘redeemed’ by a gorgeous blonde and Kipsy met a biker she likes.”
    Jane stared at him. “That’s the most cynical thing I’ve ever heard. Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?“
    “Nope. It worked. I’ve got a date tomorrow with the blonde. Sandra. You’ll like her. It’s her natural color and everything. And she’s nice and funny as well. I stink of cow manure, I’ve got to shower.“
    “I guess I’m glad the threat of Kipsy as a potential daughter-in-law has passed.”
    Mike got up in a swirl of cow smell and patted her head. “You worry too much, Mom. Don’t touch that crutch until I’m out of the danger zone.”