Redwood Bend

child, as well… And mine is excellent, by the way. So once I realized what had happened, I decided I could handle this just fine. But I’m an honest person and you deserve to know. How you respond is up to you.”
He looked out at the ocean. He circled his raised knees with his arms and put his forehead down on his knees. He groaned. He took a moment, then he straightened, looked at her and said, “And how are you going to respond?” he asked.
She actually laughed. “Well, funny you should ask. I’m going to be a little nauseated in the mornings, be very tired in the afternoons and early evenings, grow enormous and then deliver. Then I am rather committed full-time for about twenty years.”
“Do I have this right—you told your brother already, but not me?” he asked.
She took a breath. “First of all, you weren’t here and he was. I had a phone number but this wasn’t the kind of thing I wanted to tell you on the phone, at least until I was sure that was the only option. I would’ve gotten in touch eventually, you can be sure of that. But for the time being all I was sure of was that you were partying in Hollywood, kissing blond necks and stuff.”
“I told you,” he said. “A good friend, a hug. That was not a real kiss.”
“So, I had to ask for my brother’s emotional support. I’ll get a job, pay my own freight, take care of my children and—”
“Is there any discussion about whether—?”
Her expression became fierce as she stopped him by holding up a hand. “Don’t even go there. You don’t have to like it, but it is what it is.”
“Go where?” he asked, confused.
“I’m having my baby, no matter what you want.”
“I wasn’t going to ask that! I was going to ask if there was any chance we could do it together.”
“Not likely, if I’m here and you’re in Hollywood,” she said.
He ran a hand over his head. “I figured as much.”
And like a mental collage, little snapshots of his childhood came to mind—his dad leaving when he was about five. A new man with a couple of weekend sons, older than Dylan, moving in. A new baby sister, another man leaving—but at least he took the weekend sons who had never missed an opportunity to pick on Dylan. He had weekend visits with his own dad but more often with his grandmother. His mother going away to make a movie, coming home six months later with a different man, this time with a stepdaughter older than Dylan and a new baby brother for his mother. That gave him five half sibs and just as many steps.
Katie lay down on her back again, her fingers laced over her abdomen. He looked down at that sweet face and knew it wouldn’t be that way with her. It still scared him to death, but he wasn’t afraid of her. But she had his baby in her and it was the idea that a single mother was better for that baby than an unhappy family life that scared him. He could not let his child have the kind of childhood he had. He just wasn’t entirely sure how to guarantee that.
He leaned over her and put a small kiss on her lips and she opened her eyes. “You don’t need a job, Katie. Your job is being a mother and you’re an excellent one. I’ll take care of the other details.”
She almost smiled but not quite. “Does this mean you’re actually happy?”
“Are you, Katie? Happy about it?”
“When I had time to think about it, yes. It’s inconvenient and I still have to deal with some of those early pregnancy issues, but if I had a choice, I wouldn’t change it. And I realize I do have a choice.”
“And how long have you had to think about it? How long have you known?”
“Maybe a week. Maybe a little less.”
“I have a favor to ask,” he said. “Let me have that much time to get to happy. I’m a little shocked. And a lot uncomfortable. But I’m not an idiot—no one takes care of you but me.”
She just looked at him for a long, meaningful moment and he knew there was so much missing from this situation. This must be so far from ideal in her eyes—he should mention marriage and love. There was a part of him that wanted to, even if he wasn’t completely sure yet.
“I guess that’s not too much to ask,” she finally said.
Good thing Katie wasn’t expecting an instant transformation from Dylan because she certainly didn’t get one. He appeared to be in the same place. The idea of fathering a child must be terrifying to him.
She remembered Charlie. Not long after their honeymoon, he had a field training mission with the army.