Sea Breeze 03 - While It Lasts

and hard even in her sleep.
    The erection I had pressed into her ass probably wasn’t going to go over real well when sober Eva woke up. As much as I hated to , I eased my arm from around her and untangled my legs from hers. As quietly as I could I slipped out of bed. Grabbing a pair of jeans, a work shirt and my boots I left the room to go get dress ed . I didn’t want to wake her. She really needed to sleep that shit off. I’d be willing to bet that was her first drunken experience. She’d been so damn cute. If only sober Eva liked me as much as drunk Eva did. With a sigh , I pulled on my jeans and laced up my boots. It was time to get back to the cows.
    Stepping out into the morning sun , I wasn’t surprised to see Jeremy there. I wondered if he’d even gotten any sleep worrying about leaving Eva with me. I had to question his common sense a little. I would’ve never le f t Low with a guy like me while she was drunk and not thinking clearly.
    Jeremy was pacing back and forth in front of the barn door with a worried frown. His hair looked like he either forgot to brush it or he’d been running his hands through it so many times that he’d messed it up good.
    “Thought you had to leave early this morning,” I said in greeting.
    Jeremy stopped pacing and closed the distance between us. He almost looked brave enough to take me on. “Dude, please tell me you didn’t—“
    “I just gave her a spirin , some water and slept beside her.”
    “She okay ? Did you do anything to her? Is she sick? DAMMIT, I shouldn’t have left her. Josh would be furious with me. She was vulnerable and I just left. I can’t just leave.” H e stopped his tirade and starting pacing again.
    “She’s fine. I took care of her. She’s nice and safe. No harm done.”
    Jeremy shook his head and kept pacing. “No. No , she isn’t okay. She ain’t ever gonna be okay. I’ve been waiting for her to be okay for eighteen months. I know Josh would want me to s t ay and look out after her. I’ve been doing what I know he’d have wanted for a year and a half. I gave up my scholarship to Vandy . I lost a semester of school. I went to this dumb ass cowpoke community college just so I could stay near her. But I can’t keep doing this. I want to live again. I will miss Josh for the rest of my life but I d on’t want to keep mourning him.” He stopped and put his hands on his hips. His eyes looked glassy like he was trying to hold back tears. “I can’t stop my life for her anymore. But I’m afraid that if no one is here to catch her when she falls, like last night at that damn bar, then she will crash and burn. I’d never be able to forgive myself if something happened to her. She always had Josh. He was her best friend, her protector and he made her feel complete. But I’m not Josh.”
    I closed the barn door firmly behind me after checking to see if the bedroom door was still closed. I didn’t want Eva hearing this. I understood that Jeremy needed to let this out but Eva didn’t need to be so fucking close when he did.
    “Why don’t we go somewhere else and talk about this,” I suggested walking away from the barn and closer to the house.
    “You’re right. Sorry. Damn , she’s still asleep , isn’t she?”
    I nodded and led him to the front porch where I had a view of the barn door but we were far enough away that I knew she wouldn’t be able to hear us.
    Jeremy walked up t he steps and ran his hands through his hair again. He even pulled the ends a little as if he were trying to inflict pain on himself.
    “I just need to do this. I need to go to Louisiana and get everything set up for the fall. But every time I think about coming home and telling Eva that I’m leaving in August to go away to school I feel like I’m gonna vomit.”
    Poor guy was b eating himself up. He was right, though, he couldn’t keep putting his life on hold for Eva. She wasn’t his responsibility. Just because she’d been his brother’s didn’t make her his now his brother was gone. Why hadn’t someone told him this before now?
    “I’ve got a best friend who also happens to be a female. I understand what you’re feeling. I know that if Low needed me , I’d be there. I’d drop the world for her but there were times in our life that I wished I didn’t have that responsibility. Difference is that Eva wasn’t your best friend. She was your brother’s. This isn’t about Eva. This is about you wanting to fulfill what you believe