The Corrections

touched the keypad and did not return his quarter when he hung up nicely or when he picked the handset up and slammed it down. The other phone had a dial tone and took his money, but a Baby Bell voice claimed not to understand what he’d dialed and did not return the money. He tried a second time and lost his last quarter.
    He smiled at the SUVs crawling by in ready-to-brake bad-weather automotive postures. The doormen in this neighborhood hosed the sidewalks twice a day, and sanitation trucks with brushes like the mustaches of city cops scoured the streets three times a week, but in New York City you never had to go far to find filth and rage. A nearby street sign seemed to read Filth Avenue . Things cellular were killing public phones. But unlike Denise, who considered cell phones the vulgar accessories of vulgar people, and unlike Gary, who not only didn’t hate them but had bought one for each of his three boys, Chip hated cell phones mainly because he didn’t have one.
    Under the scant protection of Denise’s umbrella, he crossed back to a deli on University Place. Brown cardboard had been laid over the scuff rug at the door for traction, butthe cardboard was soaked and trampled, its shreds resembling washed-up kelp. Headlines in wire baskets by the door reported yesterday’s tanking of two more economies in South America and fresh plunges in key Far Eastern markets. Behind the cash register was a lottery poster: It’s not about winning. It’s about fun .™
    With two of the four dollars in his wallet Chip bought some of the all-natural licorice that he liked. For his third dollar the deli clerk gave him four quarters in change. “I’ll take a Lucky Leprechaun, too,” Chip said.
    The three-leaf clover, wooden harp, and pot of gold that he uncovered weren’t a winning, or fun, combination.
    “Is there a pay phone around here that works?”
    “No pay phone,” the clerk said.
    “I’m saying, is there one close to here that works?”
    “No pay phone!” The clerk reached under the counter and held up a cell phone. “This phone!”
    “Can I make one quick call with that?”
    “Too late for broker now. Should have call yesterday. Should have buy American.”
    The clerk laughed in a way that was the more insulting for being good-humored. But then, Chip had reason to be sensitive. Since D——College had fired him, the market capitalization of publicly traded U.S. companies had increased by thirty-five percent. In these same twenty-two months, Chip had liquidated a retirement fund, sold a good car, worked half-time at an eightieth-percentile wage, and still ended up on the brink of Chapter 11. These were years in America when it was nearly impossible not to make money, years when receptionists wrote MasterCard checks to their brokers at 13.9% APR and still cleared a profit, years of Buy, years of Call, and Chip had missed the boat. In his bones he knew that if he ever did sell “The Academy Purple,” the markets would all have peaked the week before and any money he invested he would lose.
    Judging from Julia’s negative response to his script, the American economy was safe for a while yet.
    Up the street, at the Cedar Tavern, he found a working pay phone. Years seemed to have passed since he’d had two drinks here the night before. He dialed Eden Procuro’s office and hung up when her voice mail kicked in, but the quarter had already dropped. Directory assistance had a residential listing for Doug O’Brien, and Doug actually answered, but he was changing a diaper. Several minutes passed before Chip was able to ask him if Eden had read the script yet.
    “Phenomenal. Phenomenal-sounding project,” Doug said. “I think she had it with her when she went out.”
    “Do you know where she went?”
    “Chip, you know I can’t tell people where she is. You know that.”
    “I think the situation qualifies as urgent.”
    Please deposit—eighty cents—for the next—two minutes—
    “My God, a pay phone,” Doug said. “Is that a pay phone?”
    Chip fed the phone his last two quarters. “I need to get the script back before she reads it. There’s a correction I—”
    “This isn’t about tits, is it? Eden said Julia had a problem with too many tits. I wouldn’t worry about that. Generally there’s no such thing as too many. Julia’s having a really intense week.”
    Please deposit—an additional—thirty cents—now—
    “you what,” Doug said.
    for the next—two