Thief of Time

worked if an Auditor was inside it.
    There were, of course, huge risks. Death was one of them.
    The Auditors avoided death by never going so far as to get a life. They strove to be as indistinguishable as hydrogen atoms, and with none of the latter’s joie de vivre. Some luckless Auditor might be risking death by “operating” the body. But lengthy consultation decided that if the driver took care, and liaised at all times with the rest of the Auditors, this was minimal and worth taking, considering the goal.
    They built a woman. It was a logical choice. After all, while men wielded more obvious power than women, they often did so at the expense of personal danger, and no Auditor liked the prospect of personal danger. Beautiful women often achieved great things, on the other hand, merely by smiling at powerful men.
    The whole subject of “beauty” caused the Auditors a lot of difficulty. It made no sense at a molecular level. But research turned up the fact that the woman in the picture Woman Holding Ferret by Leonard of Quirm was considered the epitome of beauty, and so they’d based Lady LeJean on that. They had made changes, of course. The face in the picture was asymmetrical and full of minor flaws, which they had carefully removed.
    The result would have been successful beyond the Auditors’ wildest dreams, if they’d ever dreamed. Now that they had their stalking horse, their reliable human, anything was possible. They were learning fast, or at least collecting data, which they considered to be the same as learning.
    So was Lady LeJean. She had been a human for two weeks, two astonishing, shocking weeks. Whoever would have guessed that a brain operated like this? Or that colors had a meaning that went way, way beyond spectral analysis? How could she even begin to describe the blueness of blue? Or how much thinking the brain did all by itself? It was terrifying. Half the time her thoughts seemed not to be her own.
    She had been quite surprised to find that she did not want to tell the other Auditors this. She did not want to tell them a lot of things. And she didn’t have to!
    She had power . Oh, over Jeremy, that was not in question and was now, she had to admit, rather worrying. It was causing her body to do things by itself, like blush. But she had power over the other Auditors, too. She made them nervous.
    Of course she wanted the project to work. It was their goal. A tidy and predictable universe, where everything stayed in its place. If Auditors dreamed, this would be another dream.
    Except…except…
    The young man had smiled at her in a nervous, worrying way, and the universe was turning out to be a lot more chaotic than even the Auditors had ever suspected.
    A lot of the chaos was happening inside Lady LeJean’s head.
    Tick
    Lu-Tze and Lobsang passed through Bong Phut and Long Nap like ghosts in twilight. People and animals were bluish statues and were not, said Lu-Tze, to be touched in any circumstances.
    Lu-Tze stocked his travel bag with more food from some of the houses, making sure to leave little copper tokens in their place.
    “It means we’re obliged to them,” he said, filling Lobsang’s bag as well. “The next monk through here might have to give someone a minute or two.”
    “A minute or two isn’t much.”
    “For a dying woman to say goodbye to her children, it’s a lifetime,” said Lu-Tze. “Is it not written, ‘Every second counts’? Let’s go.”
    “I’m tired , Sweeper.”
    “I did say every second counts.”
    “But everybody has to sleep!”
    “Yes, but not yet,” Lu-Tze insisted. “We can rest in the caves down at Songset. Can’t fold time while you’re asleep, see?”
    “Can’t we use these spinners?”
    “In theory, yes.”
    “In theory? They could wind out time for us. We’d only sleep for a few seconds—”
    “They’re for emergencies only,” said Lu-Tze bluntly.
    “How do you define an emergency, Sweeper?”
    “An emergency is when I decide it’s time to use a clockwork spinner designed by Qu, wonder boy. A lifebelt’s for saving your life. That’s when I’ll trust an uncalibrated, un-blessed spinner powered by springs. When I have to. I know Qu says—”
    Lobsang blinked and shook his head. Lu-Tze grabbed his arm.
    “You felt something again?”
    “Ugh…like having a tooth out in my brain,” said Lobsang, rubbing his head. He pointed. “It came from over there.”
    “A pain came from over there?” said Lu-Tze. He glared at