Winter in Eden

helped?
    Fear held her in the bow of the ikkergak all day, looking out at the empty sea. Kalaleq brought her food but she pushed it away. There was no sight of the boat, nothing at all. Perhaps they were wrong and he had gone west, out into the trackless ocean, lost to her forever. No, she would not think that, could not.
    He had gone south looking for his murgu island, that was what he had done. Yet the fear stayed with her, growing even greater as the sky darkened with the coming light.
    "There," Niumak called out. He had clambered halfway up the mast and clung by one hand, pointing out to sea. A tiny dark speck rode up on a wave, then disappeared again in the trough. Kalaleq pushed the tiller over.
    "How smart the Tanu!" he cried. "He stands out to sea while we search along the shore."
    Winter in Eden - Harry Harrison
    They called out loudly to Kerrick as the ikkergak swooped down on the little boat, laughing and shouting compliments. He must have heard them—yet he never turned to look. Just faced ahead and sailed on.
    When they raced alongside he still took no notice. Only when the ikkergak moved in front of him, cutting him off, did he look up. He pushed over on the steering oar and sat, slumped, as the sail dropped and he lost way. His hands lay on his thighs and his chin rested on his chest and he never moved or seemed aware of their shouts. Someone threw a line to him but he took no notice as it slipped into the sea. They maneuvered closer and seized his sail. When the hulls bumped together Armun saw her chance, clambered over the side and half-fell into the boat.
    "Kerrick," she called out softly. "It is Armun. I am here."
    He stirred and lifted his eyes to hers and she saw the tears that stained his face. "They are going to die,"
    he said, "all of them will die. I could prevent that, I could. Now they are going to die and it is all my fault."
    "No!" she cried, seizing him and holding him tight to her. "You cannot blame yourself. You did not make this world the way it is. You did not bring the murgu. You are not to blame."
    He was going out of his mind, she was sure of this now. This was not the Kerrick who had fought the murgu without fear, who had followed her into the frozen north. Something terrible was happening to him and she did not know what she could do. He had been like this in the camp by the lake. Though not this bad, and he had seemed to be much better after they had left. But the sickness in his head had returned—and stronger now than ever before.
    Kerrick held tight to her all night, exhausted and deeply asleep, as they sailed back to the north.
    In the morning he appeared calmer, ate and drank some water. But he did not answer when he was spoken to and the Paramutan sulked because they thought he was spoiling their fun. They soon forget this though and cried out happily when the paukaruts came into sight soon after dawn. Armun could not forget. She looked at his grim and silent face and felt hope slipping away from her. Only when they were alone at last did he answer her.
    "Yes, I was going to the island. There is nothing else that I can do. They depend upon me."
    "But what can you do alone—even if you find it?"
    "I don't know!" he cried aloud with pain. "I only know that I must try."
    Armun had no answer to that, no words to help him. She could only hold him as tightly as she could and let her body speak what her lips could not.
    The snows began that same day. First a light fall, then harder and harder until a long drift stretched out Winter in Eden - Harry Harrison
    behind every paukarut and they knew that the blizzards of winter had begun.
    There was plenty to eat and the Paramutan were well used to dozing through the long nights of winter. In the short days between storms they went hunting and fishing, but never strayed far. Kerrick would not join them, stayed inside and stayed within himself as well. Armun feared for the future because, try hard as she could, she could not shake him from the darkness of his thoughts.
    In the end it was the strength of his obsession that won.
    "I cannot bear seeing you like this," Armun cried.
    "I have no choice. It can be no other way. I must find that island. And stop Vaintè. I will have no peace until that has been done."
    "I believe you now. So I will go with you."
    He nodded solemn acceptance, as though her cry of pain was a rational decision. "That is good. So now I am halfway there. The two of us cannot do it alone but will need one other. A