Always Remember

himself up. “What do you want, Jen?”
    “I’ve come to see how you are, bringing with me a bright rosy smile.” I tilt my head to the side and give him my cheesiest smile.
    “Nice try,” he mutters. “Didn ’t Lexy tell you I want to be left alone today?”
    “Of course she did – b ut since when I did I listen to a single word you said?” I scoff.
    “Fair point. But why are you here?”
    “I’m here because your ass is droopier than Droopy Dog himself.”
    “You do know what day it is, right?” His eyes slide to mine slowly, and there ’s raw pain there. I’d bet anything memories are swirling behind them, taking over his mind just for today.
    “I know.” I sit next to him on the sofa and hug my knees to my chest, resting my head on them so I can look at him. “But that doesn ’t mean you have to be alone. He wouldn’t want you to be alone in your pain.”
    Alec shakes his head. “He wouldn ’t have wanted a lot of things I’ve done since he died. I still did them. This is my one concession.”
    “Even if it hurts others around you? Because there are people that want to be here today, specifically the person that is the reason you ’re in London. The person that made you change. Pushing her away won’t stop it hurting, Alec. Pushing everyone away today won’t stop that pain.” He closes his eyes for a brief moment. “I’m not saying you can’t feel, that you can’t hurt, because you can. Of course you can. You lost more than your father. You lost your best friend, too, and while we can’t understand that, we can still be here. Sitting locked up in this flat isn’t going to make you feel better.”
    “You ’re right, Jen, You can’t understand how much it hurts to lose him. And I hope you never have to understand it.”
    “But we will, one day,” I remind him softly. “And when that day comes I know you ’ll be the person first in line to comfort us. Just let us be here. I knew your Dad, too – remember? He’s the reason I don’t surf. Do you not remember him putting me on a surfboard age eight and shoving me out to sea because I refused to learn, hmm?”
    His lips twitch a little. “You floated right to the rocks and climbed into them to hide. We all went crazy looking for you, until he realised what you ’d done. Yeah. I remember.”
    “And I haven’t stepped foot on a surfboard since that day.” I smile proudly. “And I don’t intend to!”
    “I ’ll get you on a surfboard one day,” he promises. “Even if it means you’re strapped down, you’ll get on another surfboard.”
    “Um, no,” I deadpan. “Never. Ever. Ever gonna happen, boyo.”
    “We ’ll see.”
    “ Mmm. Like I’ll see you get up off your ass, get dressed, and go and see your girl?”
    “Jen,” he says.
    “Alec,” I mimic. “Why does everyone say my name that way? Sam did the exact same thing before I came here. Pish!” I shake my head. “This is what’s gonna happen. You, Mr. Johnson, are gonna be the man you are and get dressed. Then, you’re gonna go see your girl and let her hold you for as long as you need to be held. Know why? Because it’s okay to do that.”
    “Will you agree to go on a surfboard if I do that?” he looks up.
    “Is that what it’s gonna take?” I ask, sighing. He nods, a small spark of Alec returning to his eyes.
    I clench my jaw and narrow my eyes at him. “Damn chip off the old block you are, Johnson. Yes. I will get on a fricking surf board.”
    “Promise?” He raises his eyebrows. “And no crossed fingers!”
    “Shit.” I uncross my fingers and hold up my hands. “I promise I will get on a surfboard.”
    “Then I suppose I ’ll get up.” He pushes himself off the sofa and disappears into his room. I hum to myself as I wait, thinking that was easier than I expected.
    See. A little bit of Jen- tude is all you need sometimes.

    ~

    I follow Alec back to Lexy and Sam’s and stop him before we go back inside.
    “Hey… You can be sad, y’know?” I touch his arm. “Just let us be there with you. Especially Lexy. It’s breaking her heart that yours is breaking. Just let her be there and sooth it a little. You didn’t last year, and look at the trouble it caused.”
    “I know. I nearly pushed her away for good.” He rakes a hand through his hair and sighs deeply. “You ’re right, Jen. I need her.”
    “No need to sound so surprised.” I push the front door open and we walk through the house. “I ’m always right, but no-one