Apocalypsis 03 - Exodus

die. So what do you say we trade this baby here for Bodo? That’s a good idea, right? Little baby for big baby?”
    Kiersten tilted her head to the side, thinking. We all stood with baited breath, like we were in a courtroom waiting for the jury to announce the verdict in a murder trial.
    She looked over her shoulder and yelled, “Melody! Get out here! I know you’re standing right there!”
    Melody came flying down the stairs, obviously having been listening at the door just out of sight. She arrived five seconds later, breathless, wisps of her blond hair stuck to the sides her face with sweat. “I’m here,” she said, nearly choking with happiness. “You’re going to let me hold it? Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod … thank you, Kiers. I promise I’ll give it back in just one minute. One minute is all I need,” she said, holding out her shaking hands. She was bouncing up on her toes, her expression one of pure rapture.
    Kiersten nodded at Winky.
    Winky reached behind her to detach the cloth that she had wrapped around her and the baby and tucked in to keep it secure. She ducked her head and pulled the cloth over to release the bundle from her front completely, gently handing it over to Melody.
    Tears were streaming down Melody’s face by the time she had her arms around him. “Oh, my dear sweet baby boy … you are so, so beautiful,” she said, moving the blanket aside to expose his puffy baby cheeks.
    “He stinks pretty bad,” said Winky, screwing up her nose. “I wouldn’t get too close if I were you.”
    Melody’s eyes never left the baby and never lost their soft and gentle tone. “He just needs a little diaper change, that’s all. He’s a little angel, stinkies or no stinkies.” She leaned down and put her nose to his forehead, inhaling deeply. She hiccuped a small sob. “Oh, God … there’s nothing like the smell of a baby’s head. Nothing in this rotten world could ever take away that bit of heaven.”
    I had no idea what she was talking about, since the only smell I was getting from him would never be called heaven in my book. But I wasn’t going to be the one to burst her baby-worshipping bubble.
    I looked at Kiersten, trying to gauge her reaction to the whole thing.
    She was crying silently behind her sister, but when she saw me watching her, she moved quickly to wipe her face. She walked up to stand by Melody’s side.
    “Babe. Look at me.”
    Melody shook her head, crying for real now, no longer happy. “No. I know you’re going to tell me to give him back, and I know I have to, but just let me hold him for a little while longer. Please.” Her shoulders hunched over the baby in what appeared to be a protective move. The baby started to mewl and that was all it took to start all four of us cry along with her.
    The anger and the fear and the dire straits of the moment kind of fell away as I stared at her, listening to her weep. My heart was breaking for this poor girl. She was the youngest mother I’d ever known, and she’d lost her baby. Our parents and grandparents and neighbors and friends had been cruelly taken from us, leaving us here all alone, scared and broken. I could see now how a baby might feel like a new, fresh beginning - the embodiment of hope. And then to have that hope stolen away when it died … it was too much to contemplate. I reached up and rubbed Melody’s back in sympathy, begging her big sister with my eyes to take the deal.
    “You don’t have to give him back if you don’t want,” Kiersten said in a trembling voice. “They’ve offered to trade him for Bodo.”
    Melody cried harder, pulling the baby up and burying her face next to his. “I want to, but I can’t,” she said, her voice muffled. She lifted her head. “I know what it’s like to lose a baby. I won’t let you do this to yourself,” she said to Winky, extending the baby out away from her now, trying to give him back. She looked over at her sister. “See? I said I’d give him back. I just needed to feel him in my arms for a minute and smell him once.” She looked down at her chest, which now had two wet circles on them.
    “I think he peed on you,” I said.
    “That’s not pee,” she said, softly. “That’s milk. When I heard him cry, it started flowing.”
    “Whoooaaa,” said Winky, her arms not moving, remaining at her sides. “That’s kind of … gross and cool at the same time.”
    Melody smiled briefly and then squared her shoulders, standing up straight.