Belles on their Toes

so she won't come into the house?"
    Mother wanted to get the cameramen out of there before Tom said any more about the kitchen being rearranged.
    "If you gentlemen will just step into the parlor," she told them, trying to push them through the door.
    "And where are my birds at?" asked Tom. "You know I can't do no cooking without my birds."
    "I'll tell you about it later, Tom," Mother said firmly. "This way, gentlemen, if you please."
    The cameramen, who were picking up their lights and other equipment, were frankly intrigued.
    "This is Tom, our cook," Mother finally introduced him. "We couldn't get along without Tom, could we children?"
    "You're going to have to get along without me," Tom sulked, "if someone don't help me move my stove and freeze box back acrost the room where they belong."
    "All right, Tom," Mother gave in.
    "I ain't going to work all hemmed up like that," Tom pouted, half apologetically. "I ain't no midget, you know."

11
LYNCHING PARTY

    Mother's course recessed for the Christmas holidays. Anne arrived home from college December 19, and Al Lynch came to visit Ernestine the following day.
    Ernestine had spent the preceding month instructing us on how to behave in his presence.
    No one was to start eating at mealtimes until everyone was served. Frank was not to forget to help Mother into her chair. Martha was to refrain from discussing the cost of various items on the menu. Mother was to be sure Bob and Jane didn't go around the house with their rompers unhinged. All of the boys were to give Al top priority in their bathroom.
    "All I'm asking," Ern kept telling us, "is that for four days you try to make believe that we're reasonably civilized."
    It seemed like a fair enough request. Our first impression of Al had not been favorable. But first impressions often are unreliable, and if Ernestine had her heart set on impressing him, we thought the least we could do was cooperate.
    "We're going to try to make everything go smoothly," Mother promised her. "Now don't you Worry, dear."
    Frank and Bill moved out of their bedroom, and doubled up with Fred and Dan. Anne and Martha helped Ernestine change the sheets on one of the beds, clean the room, and stow away radio parts, arrowheads, hockey sticks, some things in glass jars containing formaldehyde, and other miscellanea. The girls also cleaned the parlor, since Ern planned a buffet supper so that her Montclair friends could meet Al.
    We knew Al was driving down from college, and we expected he'd arrive in an old Model T, probably with writing on the body. We were sitting in the dining room, just finishing lunch, when a new, 1925 Packard roadster pulled into the driveway. There was no writing on it, except for the initials A.L., in six-inch letters on the doors. Behind the wheel, wearing the most luxurious raccoon coat we had ever seen, was Al.
    "That coat," Martha whistled, "cost $600 if it cost a nickel. And goodness knows what a Packard costs."
    "Don't you ask him what it cost, either!" Ernestine warned.
    "You can count on me to act civilized,” Frank told Ernestine. "If you can land him, none of us will ever have to work."
    "Get away from those windows," begged Ernestine, who herself was peeking from behind a curtain. "Golly, look at that catsy car!"
    "Everybody sit down," Mother ordered. "Where are your manners?"
    We came back to the table and heard Tom go to answer the doorbell. A moment later he opened the door from the front hall into the dining room, and stuck in his head.
    "It's for you, Princess," he announced. "And from the coat he's wearing, it’s a good thing nobody ain't out hunting today in the royal woods."
    "That will do, Tom," Mother said sternly.
    "Henc, henc," Tom wheezed. "I seen him before at Nantucket."
    Ernestine glared at him and put her forefinger to her lips, but tried to laugh gaily.
    "When he came in," said Tom, "I ast him for six cans of peas. He jumped and said, 'Yes, sir, anything else?' Henc, henc."
    "It's so amusing to have Tom around, don't you think?" Ernestine said loudly. "Will you be good enough to excuse me for a minute, Mother dear? I'll just run out and see who it is."
    "Bring him right in," Mother told her. "Perhaps he'd like some dessert."
    Ernestine walked to the dining-room door. "Why it's Al!" she exclaimed. "How delightful!"
    She closed the door behind her, and we heard some running in the hall.
    "I didn't know he came from a wealthy family," Anne whispered.
    "He wrote Ern about it," Martha explained. "His