Bloodsucking fiends: a love story

'Oh baby, polish my lip saucer.' "
    "Interesting," Jody said.
    They lay there for a while, not talking, feeling uncomfortable and a little embarrassed. Whatever intimacy they shared physically was not echoed emotionally. They were strangers.
    Tommy felt that he should confess something personal, something to match the outrageous trust she had put in him by telling him her secret. At the same time he was curious, and a little bit afraid. It wasn't as if she had shown him a hidden tattoo. She was a vampire. How do you match that? How do you file that? Under "Adventure," he thought. I wanted adventure, and here it is.
    "Tommy," she said, not looking at him, talking more or less to the ceiling, "I'll understand if you don't want to stay, but I'd like you to."
    "I've never lived with anyone before. This is all new to me. I mean, you probably have a lot more experience than I do at this."
    "Well, not exactly like this. I've lived with a few guys."
    "A few?"
    "Ten, I think. But not under these circumstances."
    "Ten? You must be ancient. No offense. I mean, I knew that you were older, but I thought it was just a few years. Not centuries."
    She rolled over and looked him in the eye. "I'm twenty-six."
    "Sure, you look twenty-six. But you've probably looked this way for years. You probably have pictures of yourself with Abraham Lincoln and stuff, right?"
    "No, I'm twenty-six. I've been twenty-six for about six months."
    "But how long… I mean… Were you born like…"
    "I've been a vampire for four days."
    "So you're twenty-six."
    "That's what I've been telling you."
    "And you've lived with ten guys?"
    She got out of bed and started gathering her clothes. "Look, I don't use the best judgment when it comes to relationships. Okay?"
    He turned away from her. "Well, thanks a lot."
    "I didn't mean you. I meant in the past."
    He sat on the edge of the bed and hung his head. "I feel so used."
    "Used?" She leaped over the bed and stood in front of him. "Used?" She put her finger under his chin and lifted it until he was looking at her. "I've trusted you with the biggest secret I have. I've offered to share my life with you."
    "Oh, like that's an exclusive privilege." He pulled away from her and resumed pouting.
    Jody snatched a shoe off the floor and prepared to whack him with it, then remembered what she had done to Kurt and dropped it. "Why are you being such an asshole?"
    "You drank my blood!"
    "Yeah, well, I'm sorry about that."
    "You didn't even ask."
    "And you didn't protest, either."
    "I thought it was a sex thing."
    "It was."
    "It was?" He stopped pouting and looked up at her. "Does that turn you on?"
    Jody thought, Why are men never prepared for the toxic radiation of afterglow? Why can't they ride it through without becoming detached whiners or aggressive jerks? They don't get it, that cuddling afterward has nothing to do with warm, fuzzy feelings; it's just the most intelligent way to ride the wave of post-coital depression.
    "Tommy, I came so hard, my toes curled. No man has ever made me feel like that before." How many times have I said that? she thought.
    "Yeah?"
    She nodded.
    He smiled, feeling proud of himself. "Let's do it again."
    "No, we need to talk."
    "Okay. But then…"
    "Put on your clothes."
    Tommy scampered naked out of the bedroom to get a fresh pair of jeans from his suitcase. As he dressed, the infinite possibilities of life swam through his head. Only a week ago he had been staring down the barrel of a life spent in a factory town – of a union job, of a series of financed Fords, a mortgage, too many kids, and a wife who'd go to fat. Sure, there was a certain nobility in being responsible and raising a family – seeing that they never did without. But when his father told him on his eighteenth birthday that he needed to start planning his retirement, he felt his future tighten on him like an anaconda. His father had made it clear that the money for college wasn't there – so after he went to the City and starved, he could come home and get a job down at the factory and get down to the business of being an adult. But not now. He was a City guy now, part of the world; he was involved with a vampire, and the danger of living a normal, boring life had passed completely. He knew he should be afraid, but he was too elated to think about it.
    He slid into his jeans and ran back to the bedroom, where Jody was getting dressed. "I'm hungry," he said. "Let's go out and get something to eat."
    "I can't eat," she