Blue Smoke

between her legs, she tensed. This is where she’d always stopped in the past. This privacy she’d never allowed to be invaded. Then he stopped, this sweet boy, whose heart was hammering against hers, and pressed his lips to the side of her throat.
    “It’s okay, we can just—”
    She took his hand, brought it back to her center, pressed. “Yes.” She said yes, then closed her eyes.
    The shudder ran through her. Oh, this was new! This was beyond what she’d known before, or felt before, or understood. The body was a miracle and hers was quickening with heat and aches. She clutched at him, tried to find her balance. Then again, let it go.
    He said her name, and she felt him shudder, too. Then his mouth was on her breast, all wet and hot, pulling racking sensations up from her belly. She reached for him, and he was so hard. Fascinated, she explored. When he sucked in his breath and reared up, she released him as if she’d been burned.
    “I’m sorry. Did I do something wrong?”
    “No. No.” He gulped in another breath. “I, ah, I need to suit up.”
    “Oh. Okay.” Everything in her was quivering, so she must be ready.
    He got a condom out of the drawer by the bed. Her first instinct wasto look away, but she shook it off. He was going inside her, that part of him would be inside her. It was better to see, to know, to understand.
    She braced, but when he’d put it on, he rolled back to her to kiss her once more. To kiss and stroke until the hard ball of nerves dissolved again.
    “It’s going to hurt a little. I think it’s going to hurt for a minute. I’m sorry.”
    “It’s all right.” It should hurt, a little, she thought. A change so big shouldn’t come without some pain. Or else it didn’t matter.
    She felt him pushing at her, into her and struggled not to fight against it. He kept kissing her.
    Soft on her lips, hard between her legs.
    There was pain, a shock of it that took the dreamy edge off the moment. Then it eased into a kind of ache, and the ache—as he began to move inside her—into a confusing mix of excitement and discomfort.
    Then he pressed his face into her hair, his slim, smooth body fused to hers. And it was only sweet.

5
    It was strange moving back home for the summer, hauling her things from the dorm, knowing for the next three months she wouldn’t have classes, or Gina moaning every morning when the alarm went off.
    Still, once it was done, and she was back in her old room, it was as natural as breathing.
    It wasn’t the same. She was different now. She had taken several deliberate steps away from childhood. Maybe the girl who’d packed her things the previous summer was still inside her, but the one who’d come back knew more, had experienced more. And was ready, more ready than ever to see what was next.
    Even the house had changed in her absence. She’d be sharing with Fran for the next few weeks. Bella needed her own room for all the wedding paraphernalia, and Fran, in her easygoing way, had turned over her own bedroom for the duration.
    “Easier,” Fran said when Reena asked her. “Keeps the peace and it’s only for a couple more weeks. She’s all but moved into the house Vince’s parents bought for them.”
    “I can’t believe they bought them a house. ” Reena arranged tops in her second drawer the way she liked best. According to color.
    The single thing she wouldn’t miss about dorm life was the constant disorder.

    “Well, they’re rich. This is a great dress,” Fran added as she hung some of Reena’s clothes in the closet. “Where’d you get it?”
    “Hit the mall after finals. Shopping’s a great stress reliever.” And she’d wanted some new things, for her new self. “It’s sort of strange, Bella being the first of us to move out. I thought it would be you or me. She’s always been the most needy.”
    “Vince is giving her what she needs.” Fran turned, and though she knew her sister’s face and form as intimately as her own, Reena was struck. In the streams of afternoon light, Fran looked like a painting. Gilded and gorgeous.
    “I don’t know him all that well, but he seems nice—steady. And God knows he’s handsome.”
    “Crazy about her. Treats her like a princess, which is what she’s always wanted. Rich doesn’t hurt either,” Fran added with a tiny smirk. “Once he finishes law school and passes the bar, he’ll go straight onto the fast track at his father’s firm. Rightfully so, from what I hear. He’s