Carolina Moon

Cade.” She pushed out of her chair, walked to the end of the porch. Was he out there? she wondered. Watching? Waiting? “You don’t mean it, or you shouldn’t. That’s her home, and she has a right in saying who comes into it.”
    “Why should she object? Especially after I explain it to her.”
    “Explain what?” She turned back. “That you’re installing your lover in her house, because your lover’s daddy is a crazy man?”
    He drew on his cigar, took his time about it. “I wouldn’t choose those particular words, but more or less.”
    “And I’m sure she’ll greet me with fresh flowers and a box of fine chocolates. Oh, don’t be such a man about this,” she said with a wave of her hand before he could speak. “Whatever it says on the damn deed, Cade, the house belongs to the woman in it, and I will not intrude on your mother’s home.”
    “She’s a difficult woman at times … most of the time,” he admitted. “But she isn’t heartless.”
    “No, and her heart will not accept the woman she holds responsible for a beloved daughter’s death. Don’t argue with me about that.” Tory’s voice shook, nearly broke. “It hurts me.”
    “All right.” He tossed the cigar aside with one violent gesture, but his hands were gentle enough as he laid them on Tory’s shoulders. “If you won’t or can’t come with me, then I’ll take you to your uncle’s.”
    “And there we come to the second part of the problem.” She lifted her hands to his. “Irrational, bullheaded, illogical. I’ll admit all that now, so you don’t have to feel obliged to point it out to me. I have to make a stand here, Cade.”
    “This isn’t a strategic hill on a battlefield.”
    “For me, it’s very much like that. I never thought about it quite that way,” she said with a quiet laugh. “But yes, this is very much my hill on my own personal battlefield. I’ve retreated so often. You once called me a coward to get my dander up, but the fact is, I’ve been one most of my life. I’ve had small spurts of courage, and that makes it only worse when I see myself fall back yet again. I can’t do it this time.”
    “How does staying here make you brave instead of stupid?”
    “Not brave, and yes, maybe stupid. But whole. I want so much to be whole again. I think I’d risk anything not to have this empty place in me. I can’t let him run me out.”
    She gazed toward the marsh that grew thicker, deeper, greener with encroaching summer. Mosquitoes whined in there, breeding in the dark water. Alligators slid through it, silent death. It was a place where snakes could slither and bogs could suck the shoe right off your foot.
    And it was a place, she thought, that went bright and beautiful with the twinkling of fireflies, where wildflowers thrived in the shade and the stingy light. Where an eagle could soar like a king.
    There was no beauty without risk. No life without it.
    “When I was a child I lived scared in this house. It was a way of life,” she said, “and you got used to it the way you get used to certain smells, I suppose. When I came back, I made it mine, shaking out all those bad memories like dust from a rug. Airing out that smell, Cade. Now he’s tried to bring the fear back. I can’t let him. I won’t let him,” she added, shifting until her eyes met his again.
    “That’s what I did this morning. Don’t tell anyone, keep it quiet. One more dirty little secret. If you hadn’t pushed me, that’s what I’d have done here, too.
    “I’m staying. I’m cleaning him out of this place and staying. I hope he knows it.”
    “I wish I didn’t admire you for it.” He ran a hand down the sleek tail of her hair. “Make it easier to bully you into doing things my way.”
    “You don’t have much bully in you.” Maybe it was relief, maybe it was something else that made her stroke her hand over his cheek. “You maneuver, you don’t push.”
    “Well, it speaks well for the future of our relationship that you’ve figured that out and can live with it.” He drew her in, laid his lips on the top of her head. “You matter to me. No, don’t go stiff on me. I’ll just have to maneuver you. You matter, Tory, more than I’d planned for you to matter.”
    When she remained silent, he let frustration lead. Sometimes it was the most honest way. “Give me something back. Damn it.”
    He jerked her back, then up, crushing his mouth to hers.
    She tasted the demand, the heat, the little licks of