Carter Reed

stood and both disappeared down the hallway.
    Amanda lifted her eyebrows.
    I yawned, “My boss. They’re complicated.”
    We didn’t speak another word, and Carter was the next to come in. He didn’t pick me up as Noah had, but he took my hand and led me to our room.
    I looked over my shoulder, but Amanda had her head down. She was resting it on the table. I knew she didn’t want to sleep or she would’ve asked for a bed.
    After we showered, Carter lifted me and took me to the bed. He put us both under the covers and we lay together. When I started to reach for a shirt, he shook his head. He wanted only our skin against each other.
    We never talked about what I did, between any of us.
    Amanda didn’t want to go back to her apartment, so she stayed at the safe house. She lived there, and this time it was my turn to pack up her belongings. I had all of it put into storage. She only asked for a few things, mainly clothes and her computer.
    Since Amanda stayed at the safe house, so did Theresa. I didn’t understand why, but she told me that Amanda reminded her of her mother. A bond formed between the two and after three months at the safe house, Theresa took her in. There was no question, no discussion. We were all having dinner one night, Noah and Carter as well, and Theresa put down her fork, tilted her head to the side, and told Amanda she was moving in with her.
    The next day, the little belongings Amanda had were packed up and both of them left.
    I wasn’t sure who was more relieved, Noah or Carter. Since both of my friends were at the safe house, I wanted to stay there as well so Carter stayed with me. Noah was the only one who didn’t stay all the time, but he was around more often than not. Amanda asked me one night if it was weird that I was almost living with my boss, but I shrugged. Nothing seemed weird anymore.
    There was no name on Mallory’s headstone. She had no family.
    Ben was listed as her emergency contact so she was never identified officially. I was taken to the morgue after hours one time and saw that it really was her. I knew it was, but Carter wanted me to make sure. Amanda hadn’t wanted to come.
    We never talked about Mallory, not at first. After Amanda moved in with Theresa, it was another three months before her name was brought up. We started a new tradition for the three of us. We spent every Friday night at their apartment. It was spent talking, laughing, and drinking wine. Lots and lots of wine. A pizza was usually ordered as well. The nights were meant for only light conversations, but that night Amanda asked if we could have our own memorial for Mallory and the baby.
    She started crying after that.
    By the end of the night, all three of us had each used a box of Kleenex. I was a mess when I slipped into bed with Carter that night, but I relayed what Amanda had asked and explained that the rest of the night was spent sharing Mallory stories. We even talked about how pathetic we thought Ben was. Carter shook his head, kissed my forehead, and pulled me over him. He liked to sleep with me on top of him. He ran his hand up and down my back. It was only later that I realized that he didn’t sleep. He held me. Carter didn’t need much sleep. The first time I noticed, I woke to him pacing in the room. He was a caged tiger.
    When I felt tension in his body, I slept naked and on top of him. It soothed him for some reason.
    Over the next couple months, the three of us formed a tight bond. Besides the Friday Wine Nights, there were many others spent at Octave. Noah came some of those times, though he was annoyed most of the time. Brianna continued to work at the nightclub, and she still didn’t approve of a romantic relationship between Noah and Theresa. That pissed Theresa off.
    I asked Amanda one time about the cop she was going to date, and she looked at me like my head exploded. “Are you kidding me? After what we did?”
    I never pointed out that she technically didn’t do anything, but a part of me was glad she considered herself part of it. It made the guilt fade a little. Killing Ben never made me lose sleep, but I still had nightmares about Mallory. No matter what Carter tried to get me to think, I would never be rid of that guilt. It had been my job to protect her. I had failed. I had avenged her, but I had failed her. I had failed her child as well.
    However, I was learning to live with that guilt.
    It was the only point of contention between Carter and me.
    Theresa and