Charlotte House Affair 01 - My Particular Friend

lantern he held in his hands.’ #
    ‘I see, so in comparison to you …’
    ‘Yes, that was Evelyn’s cunning plan. She hopes to parade me before her parents, and threaten them with Worcester.’
    ‘While at the same time making Blotto—Mr Cuthbertson —jealous.’
    ‘Exactly, you have the
précis.
The flaw in her plan, of course, is that despite Sir Walter’s low opinion of me, I am considered quite a catch by the mothers of the world.’
    ‘Why would you agree to this plan, Mr Worcester?’
    ‘She appealed to the principle by which all Worcester men live. You might even call it a code.’
    ‘And that is?’
    ‘Never let a chum down. I’ve known Evelyn for ages and when she looked into my eyes—did I mention she’s pretty?—and asked for my help I couldn’t say no.’
    Charlotte leaned back in her contemplative attitude. She steepled her hands—no mean feat when sitting on a sopha—indicating she was intrigued by our guest’s story.
    ‘I admit I find your story absurd but you do seem to have acquitted yourself honourably. But this still leaves the matter of your other engagement. Who is the lady?’
    ‘Miss Stephanie Stilton, Cheese Mite to her friends, because she’s small you see, but she’s trouble. Knowing her is like sitting next to a cannon that could go off at any second. She has red hair. Considered quite beautiful by those who don’t know the danger she poses.’
    ‘And is she another old friend?’ Charlotte asked.
    ‘Yes, although not mutual friends with Evie. Their tempers put them at odds with each other. And the Mite’s an even older friend than Evie. She knew me before I was breeched.’ #
    ‘And how did you come to be engaged to Miss Stilton?’ I asked, finding myself quite engaged in Mr Worcester’s tale.
    ‘Yes, were you similarly … manoeuvred?’ Mrs Fitzhugh asked, obviously also finding the matter amusing.
    ‘Not quite. I was visiting my Aunt Hermione, where Miss Stilton was also a guest. She’s my aunt’s niece on my uncle’s side, well from his first marriage, which makes her related to me in some fashion I don’t understand. Not my aunt, of course, she’s obviously related to me, although you wouldn’t think of it by looking at her. I think Stephanie is my uncle’s first wife’s sister’s husband’s …’
    ‘The details are unnecessary, Mr Worcester,’ Charlotte said. ‘Pray continue.’
    ‘Right-ho. So it was at my aunt’s home in London and the Mite and I were in the garden, and there was a Moon and she got her hair tangled up in this tree thing and I had to help her free herself and she had to tilt her head back like this and I had to lean forward like this to help her and somehow or other I kissed her. I don’t know how it happened; I know it was improper. I mentioned there was a Moon, didn’t I?
    ‘Well who should come by right at that time but Aunt Hermione and she said, “Albert!” in that voice that shatters glass and frightens small children and horses and I said the first thing that popped into my head.’
    By this time even Charlotte was smiling when she asked, ‘And that was?’
    ‘I said, “It’s all right, we’re engaged.”’
    We all now laughed heartily at poor Mr Worcester’s expense, who blinked sheepishly at our amusement.
    ‘I say, it may be funny to you, but I find myself in rather a pickle.’
    ‘My … our apologies, Mr Worcester,’ Charlotte said, ‘but surely Miss Stilton does not hold you to this.’
    ‘She bally well does. She was in a cross mood because of her own romantic difficulties, you see.’
    ‘Ah, another rival for her affections?’
    ‘Old Potty, known him for years, thick as a brick wall, and about as big. He’s mad about the Mite, but she won’t return his affections because he’s too afraid to ask Aunt Hermione for the living she has floating around.’
    ‘He would take orders?’ she asked. It was now obvious Mr Worcester interested her strangely.
    ‘Already has. He’s a sort of under curate, toiling away in obscurity. Cheese Mite always says he has the stuff for it, but is kept in check by his vicar, jealous of Potty’s natural aptitude. Don’t see it myself. I’m not judged particularly bright, but Potty could give lessons to the village idiot. Good sort, though. Leant me a shilling when that was all he had in the world. Shows he’s full of Christian charity, which is probably useful for a vicar.’ #
    ‘Presumably so,’ Charlotte said. ‘I take it then that Miss