Chasing Daisy

settle in and get over my jetlag before we head off again. Holly is working at the team’s headquarters in the canteen and she’s not at home on Monday or Tuesday, so I spend my time sitting on the sofa in my pyjamas watching rubbish daytime television while eating bowls of nachos. I’m bored out of my brains – I don’t know how I ever lasted two months in New York doing little more than this – and by the time Wednesday morning comes around, I’m dying to get back to work.
    We’re catching the first flight of the day and, as usual, the hospitality staff are setting off to the track the day before anyone else arrives, so I have time to prepare before facing the lads. But I hadn’t factored in seeing Frederick again, and as I stand in the terminal, waiting to check in for our flight, I remember what he said the last time he saw me.
    ‘ We’re ALL upset, Daisy! ’
    He didn’t know about Will and me. And I didn’t even tell him I was quitting. I just left. I’m lucky he’s taking me back. Nerves flutter through me as I wonder how he’ll be with me again. I don’t have to wait long. He arrives with Klaus and Gertrude, the latter of whom embraces me warmly.
    ‘Daisy, you’re back!’
    Gertrude’s hug is hefty and I gasp for air as I pull away before Klaus happily clumps me on my back. I start to cough, while Holly tries not to laugh, but comical as we must look, I am absolutely delighted to see them again. I turn to Frederick. He nods down at me. ‘Welcome back.’
    ‘Thank you. Thank you for having me back.’ I can’t help sounding formal.
    ‘Are you well?’ he asks.
    ‘Much better.’
    ‘Good. Because no one fries the bacon as well as you. Let’s go.’ He motions to the check-in queue in front of us, and that for the moment, is that.
    I’m nervous in the car on the way to the track. I’m worried about being in the motorhome again. When we pile out of our standard black people carriers the others file off inside, but I look up for a moment at the team’s shiny, portable hospitality building. Holly glances back and sees me.
    ‘Are you okay?’ she asks, concerned.
    I nod and hesitantly follow her in.
    The hospitality area is always empty two days before the first practice session, although this afternoon it feels eerily so. Holly walks off towards the kitchen with the others, while I take in my surroundings slowly. I try not to look to my left where the stairs are, the stairs that used to lead me to Will’s private room, but I can’t help myself. A lump forms in my throat, but I swallow in quick succession, forcing it back down again. I need to keep busy.
    By Friday, I feel like I’ve settled in somewhat. It was weird seeing Pete, Dan and the lads yesterday. They arrived at the track to start getting the cars ready and I don’t think they knew I was going to be back at work. They were definitely pleased to see me, but the atmosphere here seems changed. It’s more strained, somehow. Maybe it will be different when race day comes around, I don’t know.
    On Friday morning I’m serving breakfast when I see a dark-haired guy walk through the hospitality doors. I don’t recognise him at first – he has a beard for starters – but suddenly he takes off his dark glasses and I’m floored. It’s Luis. He’s halfway across the room before he notices me and falters. He’s a shadow of his former self, and right now he looks like he’s seen a ghost.
    He reaches the table. ‘Daisy?’ he asks quietly, as though not believing it’s me standing there.
    ‘Hey,’ I reply, my face softening.
    ‘I didn’t know you were back.’ He looks unsure of himself, so different to the Luis from a couple of months ago. His usually olive-skin tone seems paler and even his beard can’t disguise the fact that he’s lost a lot of weight.
    I nod. ‘I thought it was time.’
    He doesn’t say anything, just meets my eyes for what seems like a long while.
    ‘How are you?’ I ask.
    He shrugs and looks down.
    ‘Can I get you some bacon?’ I smile, trying to cheer him up, but he barely looks at me as he shakes his head.
    ‘No, thanks. I’m not really hungry.’
    My blood runs cold.
    ‘I’m just going to head upstairs.’ He backs away from the serving table and then turns and walks off with his head down. I look after him worriedly.
    ‘Was that Luis?’ Holly asks, coming out of the kitchen.
    I glance at her. ‘I didn’t know he was that bad.’
    She nods. ‘I told you he wasn’t