Crewel

hair, woven delicately into braids around her head. Her lips are as red as fresh blood. Looking away, I imagine what they think of my dull copper hair and pasty skin. I don’t look back up as they buff and remake me. I don’t bother to speak. They finish, and continue their idle gossip, never once addressing me, and I’m not sure if it is because I am beneath them or above them. When they’re done, they leave me in the chair, and I finally brave a look at the mirrored walls around me. My image confronts me on every side, some staring back and others turning away like a stranger. In my simple robe, I look like my mother – older and more beautiful. I look like a woman.
    Standing, I take a few steps forward to touch the cool glass. I’ve never spent much time at the mirror, but it’s comforting to stand here now. A hundred images of me gazing back, proving my existence. I turn my name over in my head and try to attach it to this woman with scarlet hair that drapes down against her snowy robe, and emerald eyes set by dark gold lines against a smooth, sculpted face. This stranger. Myself. Adelice.
    As I stare, unable to turn away, one of the mirrors cracks cleanly down the side and for a moment, startled, I back away, unsure how I’ve broken it. The crack grows to reveal a panel in the glass. A woman steps through, and it seals seamlessly behind her. She’s wearing a tailored suit, and her raven hair is perfectly pinned into a twist. Her age doesn’t show in her made-up face, but the angles of her cheekbones and the arch of her eyebrows set over her luminous but clearly artificial violet eyes make her look older to me. But it’s the way she carries herself – it’s the aura of control and authority reflected in her refined face and smart suit – that tells me this is no ordinary Spinster.
    She doesn’t speak at first. Instead she runs her eyes down me, and I wonder if it’s permissible to speak to a Spinster. I think of the boy who carried me in the cells. Play dumb. I can’t imagine keeping my tongue still and dry in my mouth day after day.
    ‘Congratulations on your achievement,’ she whispers, and even in the empty room I strain to hear her. I catch my breath, afraid an inhale or exhale will overwhelm her small voice.
    ‘Not many make it to this point, Adelice. You should be proud.’ Her smile doesn’t reach her false eyes. ‘My name is Maela, and it’s my job to welcome and train Eligibles. We’ve been processing the other girls. Orientation begins tomorrow. You almost missed it.’
    ‘I’m sorry,’ I mumble, as shame washes over me, forcing me to cast my eyes down to my bare feet.
    ‘Sit,’ Maela commands, pointing to the prep chair. ‘The life of the Spinster is full of honour. You can do that which few can. You have power.’ Her whisper-quiet voice is feverish. ‘But, Adelice,’ Maela purrs into my ear, ‘you must not presume you are in control.’
    My heart is a war drum, pounding too loudly. She has been sent to break me or at least to begin the process, but it won’t work. I rub my thumb over the hourglass scar on my wrist and remember my father’s final words. I won’t let this woman scare me. But the memory of him burned into my skin sends a surge of renewed hatred seething through me. It burns through my chest and out into my arms, and I have to suppress the urge to attack this sly woman.
    Maela towers behind me and strokes my hair. I breathe carefully – in and out – aware of each breath. I watch these strangers in the mirror as she smiles, showing rows of perfect teeth against her lipsticked mouth.
    ‘We are set above those in Arras.’ Her voice is steady now, and she speaks in a normal, conversational tone as she flicks stray bits of cut hair from my shoulders. ‘But you belong to the Guild.’
    Belong. I swallow hard on the word and try to shove its bitterness down my throat.
    ‘You will have everything.’ She leans down and tucks her chin against my shoulder, taking my strange face into her cold, slick hand. ‘You will be beautiful and young.’ She squeezes my face and looses a quiet, bell-like laugh as though we’re old friends or sisters confiding in one another. ‘Oh, Adelice, the life that awaits you . . .’ With a sigh, Maela draws back up and studies us in the mirror. In one swift motion she raises a long, thin wand and I cringe back. She laughs again and strikes a match. A moment later the spark from her cigarette is flickering back at me in a