Darkness Before Dawn

behind us, I let Aubry lead me to him. All thoughts of who may or may not be my family vanish when I look into his green eyes, because he's my family. My home.

 

    I told myself I wasn't going to cry, that crying was for wimps. But seeing Blake holding my brother's arm as she walks toward me in that beautiful lace form-fitting dress she's wearing makes my heart skip a couple of beats. And when her gray eyes look into mine, I feel the air swoosh out of my body. Aubry drops her hand when they reach me and I lean in to give him a tight hug.
    "Congratulations, bro," he whispers against my shoulder.
    I want to reply but I'm afraid of what my voice will sound like if the ball closing my throat lets me get the words out. I hold out my hand and Blake places hers in it. I bring it up and kiss the top of it while looking into her eyes. "You look beautiful," I say, my voice sounding hoarse in my own ears.
    "You do too," she replies in a whisper, making me laugh.
    We turn around and face the priest for him to start the ceremony and follow his instructions, but his words are lost on me after we do the sign of the cross. All I can do is stare at this gorgeous woman beside me. She looks more radiant than ever before, if that's even possible, and I can't help but smile at her. I'm snapped out of my reverie when she nods her head toward the priest and goes to stand up, Aimee and Becky rushing to her side to help her. I shoot them a glare, but they both roll their eyes at me as if to dare me to say anything, but what the hell, I think I can help my girl get up without their help!
    We stand facing each other, holding each other's hands as the priest reads another sermon. He asks us if we have our own vows or would like to recite his and I put my hand up to stop him.
    "I have my own," I reply, earning an arched eyebrow and amused smile from Blake.
    "I do too," she says, completely flooring me because I wasn't expecting that from her at all. The customized invitation she made me the other day surprised me enough.
    The priest signals her to go first, and she crinkles her cute little nose at him before clearing her throat. She takes a step toward the priest to whisper something in his ear that makes his white eyebrows raise high in his forehead before he nods and whispers something back that makes her laugh.
    "Okay," Blake starts before licking her lips. "I didn't write this down so bear with me," she says, taking my hands in hers and squeezing. "I can't tell you what love is, I really don't know that there's a concrete definition for it. But I can tell you what love is to me. When I was younger it was the way I got butterflies in the pit of my stomach every time your name was mentioned, it was the way my mind only wanted to think of you; daydream of you. The way I yearned for you and laughed louder when I was with you. You made me feel safe, cherished and happy despite my unhappiness. And even now, all these years later, now that the butterflies aren't as lively as they once were...don't worry they're still there..." she adds with a chuckle before she sniffles "You make me feel all of those things. Once upon a time I was willing to give up those laughs, those butterflies, and the smiles you gave me because I wanted to put your safety first—like I always will—but I realize now that I'd rather keep you safe by my side, because I don't feel safe when I'm not by yours. Love is the feeling of safety you give me, the peace that washes over me when you're around. Love is knowing that one day when I'm old and my body aches, my heart won't, because I'll be with you. Thank you, Cole for teaching me what love feels like. And most of all thank you for never giving up on me even when I was ready to give up on myself."
    I take a shaky breath and bite the inside of my cheek, not allowing myself to cry in front of all these people, regardless of the bursting feeling in my heart. I lift her hands to mine and kiss them before wiping the tears from her cheeks with my thumbs.
    "I have something for you," she whispers before turning around and getting a dark wooden box with a clasp and handing it to me. I furrow my eyebrows as I look down at the box that reads All You Need is Love and pop the clasp open. I am thoroughly confused when I see the tissue paper and wonder if I should have read the little programs she made for the ceremony after all. I flap the white tissue out of the way and gasp loudly when I see the positive pregnancy stick that stares