Darkness Before Dawn

hopefully. I just have to make sure I don't keep Cole in the dark about our conversations and I know he'll be fine with them. Baby steps, though.
    "Hey," he whispers loudly before I can hang up. "I've been following Benny around, listening to his conversations, that sorta shit. You need to be careful, pay attention to your surroundings, pay attention to the people around you. Have those cops come back to talk to you?"
    "Yeah, but they left me alone when I told them I really didn't remember anything," I whisper back.
    "That's not why," he whispers harshly. "I can't talk right now, but be careful with those cops! And pay attention to your surroundings! I'm following him everywhere, but still. Shit, I gotta go."
    "WHAT? DEAN!" I shout at the dead line.
    My mouth hangs open as I stare at the blank screen. Noise coming from the other side of the door makes my eyes snap up. I make out moving shadows in the space under the door and gulp down my apprehension as I take a step closer to it. My heavy breathing accelerates when the doorknob turns a couple of times and a man mumbles a low curse. Finally reaching the peephole, I tiptoe up and lean against the door, squinting to make out the tall figure on the other side. He crouches down and sorts through a brief case before standing back up. I let out a shaky breath when our eyes meet and sag against the door before unlocking and opening it.
    "What's wrong?" Cole asks with a confused look.
    I shake my head. "What happened to your keys?"
    "I don't know what the hell I did with them! I just had them in my hands and now I can't find them anywhere!" he replies, flustered.
    I lead him inside and take in his nice business attire, navy blue pants, a white long sleeve shirt, gold tie, and a navy blue jacket hanging over his forearm. My eyes wander over his face, his defined jaw, his plump lips, his ever so slightly crooked nose, his beautiful, yet tired, green eyes, his slicked back growing hair. I trail back down his face, licking my lips at the sight of his slightly parted lips.
    "Are you going to let me fuck you or are you just going to do it all on your own, standing from there?" he asks, making me smile.
    "Nah, you can do it," I reply with a laugh as I wrap my arms around him before kissing him deeply.
    "I missed you," he whispers against my hair as he holds me tight.
    "You saw me this morning," I say with a smile.
    "So?"
    I shake my head and let go of him, still smiling, and walk over to the kitchen to serve our food as Cole gives me the details on his day. As I listen to him talk excitedly about the convention he's been attending in a local hotel this week, I find myself replaying my own day. All of my days are the same—I wake up, eat, read, help Aimee study most days, and wait for Cole. That's it. My life has fallen into this unexciting routine that I never imagined for myself. Everybody keeps telling me to give it time, that I can still do what I wanted to do before all of this, but I don't know if I want to. I'm not sure if I can. But what do you do when everything you've always pictured yourself doing suddenly seems stupid?
    "What's wrong, babe?" Cole asks, bringing me out of my daydream.
    "Nothing, why?"
    He puts his fork down and wipes his mouth before holding his hands out in front of him and signaling me to give him mine, which I do.
    "What's going on?" he asks, concerned as he draws circles on the backs on my hands.
    My shoulders slump and I let out a breath, looking down before replying. "I just don't know who I am anymore. I don't know who I want to be or what I want to do. The whole becoming a lawyer thing seems dumb to me now. I know I can't help the people I wanted to help originally, because the people that have been wronged will always be wronged, and the system won't change that."
    My eyes flutter to his, fully expecting him to be giving me an incredulous look. He surprises me by smiling at me instead. "You have time. You have the rest of your life to figure out what you want to do. I'll help you, we all will. You can still take the Bar, though. You worked hard to get to law school and you worked hard to get through it, baby. You shouldn't give up just because some bastards decided to fuck with your plans. What about social work? You can figure out how you can help kids that have been through similar things that we went through. There are a bunch of kids that get taken from their homes every day. Maybe not kidnapped, but taken away from terrible parents."
    I