Demon Angel

they will use my students against me, Savi— even Colin. Or innocents that I don't know; it does not matter." He swallowed, and signed, I can destroy the nosferatu .
    "Let the Guardians kill them; that is why they were created."
    There aren't enough of them. There are very few left.
    She shouldn't care; she shouldn't be startled. "You are not a Guardian."
    They drink the blood in unison. If we replace my blood with Colin's, they won't discover it until it is too late. It will be an anchor; Michael and Selah can transport them to Chaos, though they think it will be Caelum. If Colin performs the ritual, he can change the symbols so that the resonance follows the blood, doubling the effect.
    She squeezed her eyes shut. It was a good plan. "You could be healed."
    Silence followed her statement, and she shook her head in denial.
    "No, Lilith." His voice thickened. "It will use too much blood; I couldn't survive it. Michael can heal tissue, but he can't create blood that is not there." And Caelum would be saved, for Lucifer would have lost the wager — you would not do it personally. The five hundred years can be used to rebuild the corps .
    "No," she said.
    "It must be done anyway, Lilith. It fulfills your bargain—and the sooner it is done, the better. I would wait a hundred years, but even do we survive the nosferatu, there is no guarantee you would not have an accident. A car, the motorcycle. A stray bullet. If you died before me, your soul would be lost."
    All would be saved but Hugh. She bowed her head.
    "My name and my life are worthless," she said, and couldn't stop the tears from spilling. "But I would give them for you, do you not do this. I would give my soul for you to live."
    She did not hear him move. He lifted her chin with gentle fingers, stared in wonder at her tears. "That is why I cannot let you. I would be worth nothing did I take a few days—a few years—in exchange for it."
    Worth nothing . Only a week ago, she had stood across from him and reached into his mind, and found that fear lurking: worth nothing. A fear that did not have to be based in truth for it to be worked upon, for it to fester.
    For it to break him.
    The mark weighed heavy on her chest. She did not want to be this—but she could not let him die, and she did not know how else to save him.
    "And so despite your claim that you are not a hero, you'll try to be one. Like the foolish boy you said you were." Mockery in her voice. A tone could lie, but more important her words did not—and she said them quickly, so that he had no time to consider nuances and words left unsaid. Made them painful, so that his emotional turmoil would cloud his reading. "You will try to do what is best for the most. Do you think you are a king, your sacrifice worth that much? You are not a king; you are not even a knight, stripped of your rank."
    "I remember," he said harshly.
    He was close; her hands were between them, beneath his line of sight. He would not see her fingers moving.
    "What are you? You think to defeat those who once were angels? You are a man, a common man, saved by the lowest kind of demon. Never meant to walk among the angels." They had run from Earth, and you never run from anything . "You could never be compared to them." Your worth is infinitely more . "And you cannot save me this way." It will destroy me . "You are worth nothing." To them, but not to me. You are everything to me .
    His features were absolutely still. "This is truth? You believe this?"
    "Yes."
    His eyes closed, and a sob rose in her throat when he opened them again; she'd seen this before. They glittered like blue ice. Not Caelum there, but the tormented faces Below—just as when he'd slain her, given her freedom.
    She'd thought then it was a reflection of her Hell, but it was his.
    His—and she was its cause.
    "I will not be worth grieving then." His hand dropped from her face, and he turned away.
    She stared after him; his broad shoulders were squared against her words. It was like being ripped in two, to cause him this much pain and know it had been for nothing. No, he did not break; but she would—
    He stopped, thrust his hands in his pockets. He did not turn to look at her. "I can accept that you will always be Lilith, will always be the demon." A visible tremor shook him, and she pressed her fist to her teeth to hold in her explanation, her denial. I don't know how to save you . A demon knew nothing of saving, only lying and deception. "I do not understand