Diplomacy

even know what I’m apologizing for.” Lucas sat up straight and looked over at Jack, who was still reclining, staring out to the horizon where the sun was setting.
    “You were apologizing for almost getting caught.” Lucas stared at the American for a long time, searching for confirmation, wanting to know if he understood Jack right, but his stare was not returned.
    “Actually... I’m not sorry,” he found himself saying, deciding to be brave for now.
    “Thought not,” Jack answered and a small smile spread across his lips. He took a swig from his brandy, got up from the bench, and walked around Lucas on his way back inside.
    As he passed the young man, he let his index finger brush lightly against Lucas’s jaw and then squeezed his shoulder, before disappearing again into the living room.
    Lucas was dazed by the gesture as he let his head fall to the side, in an attempt to recapture the feeling of the older man’s hand against his face.
    He replayed this evening’s events in his head over and over again and kept coming to the same conclusion. That was not the way a man behaved if he wasn’t interested.

    D i p l o m a c y | 31

    Jack walked inside the house again, a smile on his face as he raised his hand to his nose, catching the faint residue of Lucas’s aftershave left there by the brief touch.
    Despite his resolution to not get carried away, the young man had invaded his heart, and he knew it was not going to be easy to work with him from now on. Even though there was no way he could ever give in to these feelings, a part of him still enjoyed them. And why couldn’t he indulge himself? Lots of men had affairs, slept around behind their wife’s back.
    From the dimly lit living room, he could see Maria in the kitchen with Lucy. Could he be unfaithful to his wife? Lucas clearly wanted more; Jack could practically see the lust in the young man’s eyes when they were pointed at him. He knew the ball was in his court. He didn’t think that Lucas would ever make a bold move towards him, because the young man knew that Jack had the power to get him fired. Goodbye dreams of diplomacy. Come to think of it, Lucas had the same power over him. If he ever let their relationship develop, they would have to be on their toes constantly, always afraid of being exposed. Having an affair behind your wife’s back was almost considered natural. You apologized, kissed, made up, and promised never to do it again. But an affair with a man would cost him his commission; he knew that and had always known that. His credibility would be shot. He would come to the bargaining table with empty hands, while his adversaries would be laughing behind his back.
    Jack shook his head to get the thoughts out of his mind and took one more deep breath before entering the kitchen.
    “Dessert almost ready, Maire?” he asked his wife affectionately.
    Maria looked up at him with loving eyes and then looked over to Lucy. “He doesn’t trust me in the kitchen.” She put her arm around his shoulder and pulled him close. “But we’re making my specialty, aren’t we?” Then back to Lucy, “Blueberry pie with ice cream.”
    “Sounds yummy!” Lucy exclaimed.
    “Not to mention so easy to make, Lucas could probably do it,” Jack told her after playfully nuzzling his wife’s neck.
    Jack relaxed his grip on Maria as he saw Lucas walk into the kitchen. He could tell the Brit was trying to look cheerful.
    “I could make what?” the younger man asked.

    32 | Z a h r a O w e n s

    Jack curled his index finger at him. “Come here.” As Lucas moved towards him, he grabbed his apron, came around Lucas’s back and slipped it over his head, making bold gestures like a magician at a kid’s birthday party. He could see Lucas smile, a little unsure of the situation and how to react, but the women were clearly enjoying the spectacle.
    Jack flew around the kitchen grabbing an assortment of things and showing each one off to Lucas and then the girls. “We need… one egg…
    one small and one large bowl to separate them. Can you do that, Lucas?
    Separate an egg?”
    Lucas took the egg and the bowls from him and gave him a doubtful smile. “Well, I can try?”
    The American continued. “We also need one box of fresh blueberries, very much in season right now. The sugar. Maria, dear, would you be so kind…” He pointed at the cupboard behind his wife, at which she reached up into it and handed him what he wanted.
    “Lucas, I see you’ve