Emma's Secret: A Novel

her best friend’s arms wrapped around a man Megan had once desired tore her apart. A heaviness settled over her as memories flooded of her own infidelity. No matter what anyone else said, she’d betrayed her husband with that one kiss. She knew it. Riley knew it, and even Peter knew it.
    She would never forget what had happened that day. It had been right after the first anniversary of Emma’s disappearance. She’d just dropped off a new flyer with a different image of Emma to be printed at the downtown photo shop. She stopped in at the library and grabbed a few books she’d placed on hold for Hannah and Alexis and decided to wait at a nearby park for the flyers to be printed. She sat on one of the park benches and browsed through a home decorating magazine she’d picked up earlier until she heard the laughter of children nearby. Two small girls were playing in the fountain that sat in the middle of the park, splashing each other while their mothers stood by. Megan smiled and was about to return her attention to the magazine when something caught her eye. Another little girl with blonde curly hair.
    Megan still recalled the way she dug her fingernails into the palm of her hand and forced herself to count to ten, just like Kathy had told her to do. It took everything in her not to rush over to see if it was Emma. She’d done that too many times to count, and it never ended well. But when the little girl looked her way and a wide smile covered her face, nothing could have held Megan back from rushing over to her. She could have sworn that little girl was her daughter…until she got closer and realized the curly blonde hair was the only thing Emma and this little girl had in common. But by that point, the smile had disappeared from the girl’s face and, instead, she stared at Megan in horror.
    Megan would never forget that look. Never.
    She rushed away and drove straight to Peter’s office, only to find out he was out with
her
for the afternoon. When she arrived home, she found Riley waiting in her driveway. All it took was one look; once inside, she found herself bawling like a baby in his arms instead of confiding in her husband.
    Maybe it was the way he stroked her hair or rubbed her back. Maybe it was the fact that he didn’t condemn her for thinking that that little girl was Emma or berate her for scaring the little girl.
    Or maybe it was just the fact that he was there when Peter was not, and all Megan needed was someone to lean on.
    Either way, one second Megan was crying against Riley’s chest, and the next, his lips were on hers and she found herself lost in the moment.
    It was one kiss, but the ramifications were endless. For both of them.
    Peter had walked in shortly afterward, when they stood there staring at each other trying to understand what had just happened. No words were said, but they all felt the tense undercurrents. To this day, Peter had never confronted her about it.
    Megan’s shoulders heaved as she acknowledged the wide range of emotions flowing through her. Maybe that was their problem. The many things she and Peter had left unsaid to each other were eating away at them, tearing them apart, and no matter how hard they worked at rebuilding their marriage, some things couldn’t be swept under the carpet. She was ashamed at herself for allowing the silence to grow between them, for thinking it would go away if it were ignored. Like everything else in her life.
    She was also angry with herself for feeling betrayed—and at Laurie for betraying her. It didn’t make sense for her to feel this way. And yet she did. While she might not have slept with Riley, there had been an emotional connection, and sometimes that could be stronger than a physical connection.
    Megan leaned her head back against the door. She loved Peter. With all her heart. But he hadn’t been there when she needed him the most, and that pain, that memory of feeling so…alone, seemed like it would never go away. But she couldn’t forget what it felt liketo have someone else in her corner, someone who
did
believe in her. Someone who encouraged her to never give up instead of suggesting they hold a memorial service.
    Megan’s jaw clenched. Peter had given up. Megan sucked in air, drawing it deep into her lungs. Everyone else gave up, but she never did.
    Using the wall for support, Megan climbed to her feet. She needed to leave all that in the past. Her counselor had urged her to learn to forgive. And she had, or so