Jane Actually

Rudyard Kipling’s
The Janeite
. Of course he knew there was a basis for the story. A soldier, returned to England and recovering from his wounds at a manor house pressed into service as a hospital, might well be given a copy of
Pride and Prejudice
by a kind-hearted nurse.
    OK, that’s the romance author in me. I’ve created an elaborate background story of a man I’ve just met and of whose identity I am uncertain. Oh well, what does it matter if he truly is a Tommy that died in World War I or an accountant who died in Ipswich in 1988? He’s still my roommate.
    1 Slang for British soldiers, especially during World War I

Where to put Jane
Accommodating the author at the AGM
    “S houldn’t she open the AGM?” Beth Ann asked for possibly the third time since their lunch began. The organizing committee was busy trying to rearrange the schedule. Dr Joan Klingel Ray, former JASNA president, had been their original choice to open with her talk: “Sense and Sensibility as The Problem Novel.” Dr Ray was a popular choice, back when the theme was simply two hundred years of
Sense and Sensibility
.
    “The first plenary session? No, then everything else is a letdown,” Cindy told her friend.
    “But everyone will be clamouring for it.”
    “Then all the more reason to delay it for Saturday,” said Megan, the other coordinator. “Besides, not everyone can make it on Friday.”
    “Oh right,” Beth Ann conceded, and then added, “but if it were Friday, then everyone can be talking about it the whole weekend.”
    “It’s not like we won’t be talking about it the whole weekend either way. Actually having Jane Austen at the AGM? How wild is that?” Megan asked her friends.
    “Would you ladies care for another round?” their waiter asked, interrupting Cindy, who was about to reply to Megan’s remark.
    All three ladies agreed and also asked for another basket of chips and salsa, which the waiter immediately brought to their table, spurring another round of dipping and munching.
    “It’s actually a bit of an imposition, though,” Cindy said as she knocked back the remainder of her margarita and looked in vain for the waiter to bring the second round. She followed this with ice water, cursing that she’d allowed herself to be tricked into the endless cycle of salty, spicy food and salty drink and then ice water followed by a massive Mexican dinner. It was her fault for agreeing to discuss their planning at a restaurant instead of at one of their homes.
    “What’s an imposition?” Beth Ann asked.
    “You know, what Megan said,” she replied.
    “What? I just said it’ll be wild to have Jane Austen there.”
    “Don’t you want Jane Austen to come?” Beth Ann asked.
    “Well, sure, but let’s face it, we have to change everything to do it … move everyone’s schedules around … I mean if we move someone to Friday, well Dr Davis had planned to fly in Saturday morning.”
    “That’s why I wanted Jane to talk Friday. My friend Carol, she’s the one who introduced me to Jane, she wasn’t planning to come to the AGM this year because of her nephew’s wedding, but she thought she might fly in Thursday night and …”
    “It’s not just the inconvenience,” Cindy said, a little more loudly than she’d intended, and then regretted saying it. “No sorry, forget I said anything. She’ll have to go on Saturday and …”
    She realized her two friends were looking at her. They’d been friends in the North Texas chapter for years, all of them joining JASNA about the same time, and by now they knew each other pretty well, and they’d caught Cindy’s tone.
    “What’s up, Cindy?” Beth Ann asked.
    “Yeah, you’ve got that tone.”
    Cindy looked at her friends and decided to confess her misgivings. “I mean how do we know it really is Jane? Won’t we feel incredibly stupid if it’s not her?”
    Beth Ann’s confusion was evident. “But she is Jane Austen. The AfterNet says she is.”
    “What, the AfterNet is always right? I mean how can anyone really be sure?”
    “Well, legally she’s Jane Austen, right? So what difference does it make?”
    Cindy shook her head. “No, that’s not what it means at all.”
    “Huh?” Megan and Beth Ann said in unison.
    “I’ve been looking into it. All it means is that the AfterNet has recognized her as Jane Austen. But it’s just like a company policy, or a quasi-governmental agency’s policy, or whatever the AfterNet is. But legally, I don’t think