Just Remember to Breathe (Thompson Sisters)

keep quiet in the apartment,” Dylan said. “My roommates aren’t even alive this early in the morning.”
    “What the fuck is quiet?” Sherman asked loudly.
    Dylan gave him a look, and Sherman smiled, then mimed locking his lips.
    We entered the apartment, and Dylan showed Sherman where he could stow his bags. I went to get a shower first, and Dylan stopped me in the hall and whispered, “Is this okay? I know your sister’s coming; I wasn’t expecting Sherman until next week.”
    I kissed him on the cheek. “Of course it’s okay.”
    He grinned. “You’ll love Sherman. He’s a great guy.”
    “I think I already do.”
    Almost an hour later we were eating breakfast in a booth at the back of Tom’s Diner. I sat to Dylan’s right, and Sherman was across from us.
    “So,” Sherman said, “If you don’t want to tell me anything, you don’t have to. But after two years of hearing about your story of love and woe, I’m really curious. Last I heard, you two had broken up, and Dylan was busy attaching explosives to his laptop. How’d you get back together?”
    “I’ll answer, but you’ll have to tell me why you call him … what was it? Studmaster? ” I grinned when I asked the question.
    He burst into laughter. “Deal,” he said.
    “Oh, no,” Dylan said. “Not going to happen.”
    “Too late, dude. I already promised the lady, and I never break a promise.”
    Dylan rolled his eyes and drank his coffee.
    “Well,” I said. “My second day of classes this year, I was walking down the hall to my work-study assignment, and there was this surly looking guy lurking in the dark. And the first words he said were something like ‘Don’t touch me.’ And it was Dylan, the love of my life. One thing led to another and here we are.”
    “There’s gotta be more to it than that.”
    I laughed. “A little bit. I did have to take him to the hospital one night after he punched a wall.”
    He raised an eyebrow. “Now that sounds like Dylan.”
    I asked, “What was that about his laptop?”
    He chuckled. “I don’t know if I should tell this story.”
    “You shouldn’t,” Dylan said.
    “Now you have to,” I countered.
    Sherman put his hands out to his side in a shrug. “Sorry, Paris. I’m powerless before the lady’s requests.”
    He turned to me and grinned. “Paris here has been known to be a little um, dramatic. The day you guys broke up, he was sitting there calmly on his laptop. After he finished doing whatever it was he was doing, he calmly closed it. Then he stood up, lifted the laptop and slammed it down on the table. I actually almost got a Purple Heart for flying shrapnel from the cracked case.”
    “You did not, you idiot,” Dylan said. He was shifting in his seat, clearly uncomfortable.
    “So anyway,” Sherman said. “He hadn’t done enough damage yet. So he picks up his laptop in one hand, and his rifle in the other. Then he says, calm as ever, ‘I’m going for a walk, guys.’ Obviously we were pretty curious, so we followed him. He goes out to the wire, and leans the laptop against a metal post. Then backs up 20 yards, raises his rifle, and empties a thirty round magazine into the laptop. Of course, shots are being fired, and we’re in the middle of the boonies, so by the time he’s done, the whole base is going nuts. Everybody’s on red alert, running to their emergency stations, getting down in the bunkers, freaking out. And there’s Dylan, blasting away at that laptop like it’s an entire riot of hajis.”
    Oh, wow. I found myself wishing Sherman hadn’t told me the story. It might make a good story, but it also made light of the very real pain he’d been in. Pain I’d caused, because I was drunk, and doubting our relationship. I put my hand on his thigh and squeezed. He leaned against me, just slightly, and I think it was okay.
    “That’s one story too many, Sherman,” he said.
    “But I haven’t heard about the Studmaster,” I said, smiling at him. “I want to know all your secrets.”
    Sherman chuckled. “You know this clown and I went through basic training together, right? Well, he had several pictures of you taped up inside his wall locker.”
    Oh… I didn’t know that. We’d been very much on the outs when he enlisted in the Army.
    “Anyway, one day Drill Sergeant Powers is conducting an inspection, and he looks in the locker, and he says, ‘Paris, is this your girlfriend?’ And Paris here, he responds, ‘She was, Drill Sergeant. I’m