Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 10

illusions and saw the real me...and until a few moments ago, I thought that perhaps you had come to...well, never mind. I've no right to ask that of you."
    Ren struggled to remain angry at Con but the pain and regret so evident in Con's voice tore at Ren's heart. Did Con really regret his actions? Did he really want more from Ren than one empty night? Ren was so torn, so confused. The months of constant degradation, and the self-loathing brought on by Anzel's relentless torture burned deep in Ren's soul. How could this man possibly love him? And yet…the idea of being loved, of being cared for, of being something more than a body to be used by a vicious tormentor…it had such allure...held such promise. Ren felt every defense he had built up within him begin to crack and crumble. Without thinking he heard himself utter the words that might alter his very existence and actually save him…save his soul.
    "Go ahead, ask," Ren whispered, holding himself so very still, as if the slightest movement might break the fragile moment.
    Now Con looked up and his eyes shimmered with unshed tears.
    "I have no right to ask that you love me...that you give me just one chance to prove to you that the man you once knew no longer exists and in his place stands a man who would move heaven and hell to have you by his side."
    Ren stood, frozen to the spot. The pathway, that Con's admission prompted, opened up before him, and the decision it allowed for caused his heart to race and his palms to sweat. Here was his chance. He could destroy this man sitting before him. He could take the heartfelt declaration of love and smash it to bits with just one word…no. He could keep this man and his love at a distance and concentrate on the plan, the plan that would keep Con and Gael safe from Anzel.
    If he rejected this man right now, it would give him the much needed reason to keep Con at a distance and there would be no possible way that Con would want to follow him. He would be able to kill the assassin, murder Anzel and escape and Con would be safe from the constant threat of Anzel's assassination attempts. The man he loved would be safe. All he had to do was turn away. Deny his feelings for Con and leave him alone, here in the dark.
    In the dark…Ren remembered the dark…remembered how the thought of one day seeing Constantine, of holding him, of loving him had kept the terror at bay. He knew how that thought had sometimes been the only thing that kept him from going insane in that hell. That it had kept him alive when death would have been the preferred choice. But even as each of these thoughts ran through his mind, Ren saw himself move, stepping closer, his hand reaching out to caress Con's cheek, his lips molding against Con's in the gentlest kiss.
    Drawing back, Ren dipped one finger in the lone tear that slid down Con's face and touched it to his mouth and with that small gesture it was as if Ren had unleashed all the passion he and Con had stored up since their last night together so long ago. Con grabbed Ren's head and crushed his lips to his, moaning aloud. Their tongues battled and their hands tore feverishly at the clothing that kept skin from touching skin. Shirts were torn apart and thrown aside, followed by trousers being pushed downward and then kicked away. Hands roamed over heated flesh while tongues continued to tease and duel for control. Breaking off, Con kissed a long line down the side of Ren's neck, pausing to suck at the tender skin beneath his ear as Ren gasped and shuddered.
    Continuing down that long slender column, Con finally kissed and sucked his way to Ren's chest, where he captured a rosy nipple between his teeth and tugged gently causing Ren to throw his head backwards with a loud gasp, and his hips to buck forward. Con worked the tiny bud, biting and licking and then gliding across Ren's bare, smooth chest to capture the other between his teeth as well. Drawing back, Con paused at the black marks he could see coloring Ren's pale chest. Hesitating, he traced one finger lightly over the bruised flesh and then looked up into Ren's eyes seeking permission, everything within him wanting to mark the boy as his, yet fearful of hurting him.
    Understanding Con's reluctance, yet needing with everything inside him to have Con's marks cover the evidence of Anzel's vile attempts at mastery, Ren gently pushed Con's head down to his chest. Caressing the silky hair, Ren murmured, "please Con, make me yours." With an