Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 3

refilling his own and decided to just drink straight from the bottle, because fuck it, he'd already ruined this trip. Just like he managed to do with everything else in his life. "Cheers, goddamnit," he murmured, bringing the bottle to his lips and upending it for a deep pull.
    If it bothered Ethan, his friend didn't show it. "Know who I saw the other day?" Ethan drank, grimaced. "Old Howard, the English prof. Guess he lives in my town now."
    "Ugh. Lucky you."
    "I didn't think he was that bad. Dry and boring, maybe. But he wasn't too big of a jerk."
    Jude raised an eyebrow. "Not to you. You're the right everything."
    "Huh?" Ethan turned to him with an injured frown. "What's that supposed to mean?"
    "Me big dumb lazy Injun. Drink much firewater."
    Ethan's features softened. "Come on, man. Don't do that to yourself."
    Jude stared at the bottle in his hand and let out a sigh. "Sorry, bro. I had a hard time with that son of a bitch, is all." He hadn't actually thought about Howard in years. The man had made his first year in college more miserable than it already was—no easy feat, considering the circumstances. "He was always on my ass, throwing little jibes at me. Big ones, too. One time I fell asleep in class, and he..." His stomach clenched, and he took another swig of whiskey.
    "He what?"
    Christ, why was he telling this story? Must've been drunker than he thought. But he'd already started it, and it wasn't like Ethan would blab it around. He'd always been able to tell the man anything and not worry about it—unlike his lover, who delighted in humiliating him. Ex-lover now. And he was happy about that, damn it. Even if he'd had to start carrying a gun because of the crazy bastard. "Okay," he finally said. "So, you know how I was working two jobs?"
    "Two?" Ethan's brow furrowed. "I knew about the diner."
    "Yeah, well, that wasn't enough." He didn't bother going off about how he had no support network, how he got kicked off the rez when he came out and wasn't even allowed to talk to his mother. Not that she'd have helped him, anyway. "I was doing an early-morning shift at a shipping place, too. So I'd get off late at the diner, grab a few hours' sleep, and load trucks until classes started."
    Ethan made a sympathetic sound. "That had to suck."
    "It did." Jude shrugged. "I was drained. Passed out cold in Howard's class one morning. He banged on the desk to wake me up, and I just about fell out of the chair." He let out a slow breath. "And then he stepped on my nuts, in front of the whole class."
    " What? Why didn't you report him or something? He should've been fired."
    It took him a minute to realize Ethan was taking him literally, and he couldn't help a short laugh. "I mean, he insulted me. He said—and this is a direct quote. I'll never forget it." Jude screwed up his features in a parody of the tight old fuck. "Mr. Williams. If you must immerse yourself in such disgusting behavior, I'd appreciate it if you would confine your drinking and your sexual relations with boys to the weekends."
    Ethan's jaw dropped. He clapped a hand to his mouth, and a snort burst from behind it.
    "Oh, so it's funny?"
    "No." Ethan lowered his hand. His lips twitched uncontrollably. "It's just...damn. You do Howard better than he does."
    Jude blinked a few times, and then gave over to laughter. When Ethan joined in, he only laughed harder. "Maybe it was kind of funny," he managed. "I mean, the look on his face—"
    "Like he just kissed a used toilet plunger."
    "Yes! Exactly." Jude leaned back and grinned. That was the thing about Ethan...no matter how miserable he was feeling, the man had a knack for lifting his mood. He felt half guilty about it sometimes. Like he was just using Ethan for comic relief. And before he could stop himself, his thoughts made their way out of his mouth. "What are you getting out of this, anyway?"
    Ethan's lingering smile faded. "Out of what?"
    "This. Us. I mean, you hanging out with me." Too late to take it back now. With any luck, Ethan would be too drunk to remember this conversation. "You're always there for me, and all I do is bitch about my life. I never do anything for you."
    "You brought the Johnnie." A faint thread of desperation ran through Ethan's words—or was he imagining that? "Jude...you're my friend. My only friend, actually." He huffed out a breath. "Man, that sounds pathetic. But it's true."
    "What about Emily? I thought you two still talked."
    "Yeah, I guess."
    Jude almost reached out,