Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 8

Hopefully all Trey would hear was the arousal.
    "Fuck me," Josh growled. "Quit messing around. Do it." Now while I'm still half hard and think maybe I do want it.
    "You're sure?"
    "Dammit, Trey, now!"
    Trey's fingers slipped out of him and Josh moaned in relief. He heard the rip of a condom and then pressure returned, broader and softer and yet inexorable. Josh bit his lip hard and held rock steady as Trey worked his cockhead inside. That did hurt, but not unbearably. The hurt eased off rapidly to an odd uncomfortable fullness and a heated stretch. Josh grunted, "More."
    Trey took Josh's hips in his hands, nudged Josh's right leg higher on the bed and began to thrust in small, circling strokes that moved him gradually deeper. It wasn't bad. It wasn't good though. Josh eased off his lip before he bit through it and set himself to endure it. He grunted as Trey deepened his strokes slightly. Then Trey stopped. Josh thrust back hard, impaling himself more. He wanted this for Trey, wanted everything for Trey, but he needed it done soon. "Don't fucking stop."
    Trey's fingers dug into his hips, pinning him down. Trey said in an odd voice, "Josh? Are you okay?"
    "I'm fine. I swear. You're not hurting me."
    Trey still didn't move. Josh tried to fight that rigid grip and couldn't. "Trey, fuck, don't drag it out. Fuck me." He hoped the roughness in his voice would sound like need.
    But Trey said quietly, "You're not into this, are you?"
    Josh opened his mouth for the lie, and then pressed his lips together tightly. Trey reached between them for the rim of the condom and pulled out. Josh jerked as his body was released. He squeezed his eyes shut. I tried, dammit. I was doing it. What else can I do? I don't know what else to do. He waited for Trey to laugh, or get mad, or maybe change his mind and fuck him after all. That wouldn't be the worst thing. He managed to say, "I don't mind, if you like it."
    "Jesus Christ, Josh!"
    He flinched.
    Gentle fingers stroked from his shoulders down his spine, no lower than his waist. Then Trey's palms began rubbing his back in firm, smooth circles. Just rubbing and stroking with no anger, no agenda. It wasn't a sexual touch, just comfort. Long minutes passed before Josh got up the nerve to roll his head and look back at Trey.
    Trey gave him a tentative smile and then stopped massaging long enough to get off him and pull the condom off his own still-hard dick. Josh rolled over and reached toward Trey's groin. It seemed like the least he could do, to give Trey a hand job or blow him, before Trey left in disgust. But Trey captured his hands, weaving their fingers together. He scooted down the bed with a wiggle, until he was lying beside Josh.
    Josh said, "Let me finish you."
    Trey raised their clasped hands and kissed Josh's fingers. "Oh yeah, we're gonna finish each other in a minute. But we need to talk first."
    Josh quipped, "What kind of guy talks when he could be fucking?" His throat hurt. His chest hurt.
    "The kind of guy who wants to be making love, not just fucking."
    That silenced Josh.
    Trey let go of his hands and gathered him into a loose hug, their bodies touching in random places, shoulder to chest, knee to thigh. Trey laid his head beside Josh's on the pillow, close enough that he blurred in Josh's cross-eyed view.
    "So, Josh, I'm guessing you don't actually like to bottom."
    "I thought I might. With you."
    Trey's body got tenser. "Had you ever tried to before?"
    "Not really."
    "Would you rather top? 'Cause I'm seriously okay with bottoming."
    Josh swallowed hard. Here it came, and he wasn't ready to explain to Trey that he was some kind of freak, the kind of guy who was never going to be enough in bed. He blinked hard and pressed his face into Trey's neck. Trey smelled like sunshine.
    Trey's hand rubbed the back of his head. "Joshie?" The old childhood nickname. "Talk to me."
    "I didn't mind bottoming, really. I'm just not used to it. No one else mattered enough to try." Surely it was better than watching Trey turn to other men. "We can do that when you want to. And I really don't need to have turns topping. Jesus, can we stop talking about it?"
    "Nope." Trey kissed his hair, and hugged him tighter. "You're not some kind of get-off-quick one night stand to me. Sex is supposed to be fun for both of us. So can you get your head out of your ass and tell me what you actually do and don't want in there?"
    This was the most embarrassing conversation of Josh's life. Well other than the