Lynx Northern Shifters 3

didn’t want to be touched and he’d grabbed him anyway.
“Trey,” he said quietly and nodded once.
Trey’s gaze intensified but he didn’t answer.
“I think I’d better eat.”
As Trey stepped towards him, Jonah realized he was going to reach for him, and Jonah said, “No.”
Trey froze while Jonah stepped around him and out of the room. He might have been able to sleep with Trey last night as a cat. His cat was ultimately more forgiving. His cat also thought it was his job to protect Trey, even protect Trey’s feelings. But Jonah could not stand to be touched by anyone, including Trey.
He didn’t want to think about Trey, wanted the man gone from his life. It was over. He’d discovered Trey was alive, not dead, he’d discovered that someone wanted to kill Trey and he’d stopped that, and he’d been freed. But that was an ending, not a fresh start between them. Jonah simply wanted to be alone. All those months in the cities searching, talking… It was over and he’d had enough.
“I’m sorry.” Trey had followed him back to the main room and stood a good five feet away as Jonah rummaged through the food supplies—supplies built up by Trey—to make breakfast.
Jonah glanced up. “I don’t want your apologies.” He didn’t and he had no desire to know what Trey was apologizing for.
“I couldn’t get back here when I wanted to. I didn’t mean to leave you waiting here for so long.”
“Uh-huh.” Of all things, Jonah had a hankering for porridge and jerky, a breakfast he had been sick of eating a couple of years ago.
“Okay, let’s eat first,” Trey said and went quiet, thankfully. Jonah liked silence. He was tired of noise. So they ate breakfast and washed up the dishes. Then Trey had to say, “I’d like to talk with you, Jonah.”
“I’m pretty tired actually. It’s been a while since I’ve shifted and it’s worn me out.”
“You’re still recovering from almost starving to death.”
Jonah set his jaw. He hadn’t quite realized how thin he’d become. The weight loss had been so gradual and his state of mind so focused on just getting through the days. As he gained weight though, he could see that he’d been dangerously skinny. Right now, he was ready to rest, and he went to lie down on the cot Trey hadn’t been using.
Trey plopped himself on his cot, knees too close, brushing near Jonah without quite touching, and Jonah edged away.
“My assignment was more complicated than I predicted,” Trey continued.
Jonah looked up at the ceiling. “I really don’t want to talk about this.”
He hoped Trey would rise and leave, but he didn’t move. Jonah thought if he closed his eyes he might be able to sleep.
“I came back here.” There was a stubborn note in Trey’s voice, almost embarrassed too, which despite himself Jonah found interesting. “It was almost but not quite two years later. You’d left.”
“I know I left,” snapped Jonah. The ceiling had rafters. He usually cleaned them once a year but now they were full of cobwebs. The entire place needed to be fixed up after years of neglect.
“Why did you leave?”
Jonah heaved a sigh. “It doesn’t matter to you that I don’t want to talk?”
“It matters.” Trey reached for him, placed a hand on his arm and Jonah jerked up to sitting, pulling away.
“Don’t. Touch. Me.” He looked at Trey then, saw his troubled expression. “I don’t want you here. I don’t want to talk to you. And I don’t want you to touch me, hug me or anything . Are we clear on that?”
Trey’s brow furrowed. “What was last night?”
“My lynx and I are not always in perfect agreement. You could say my lynx likes you better than I do.”
“All right.” Trey scrubbed his face.
“I left,” said Jonah, “because I needed to know if you were alive or if you were dead. I got my answer. I’m back. And we’re done.”
“I understand you’re angry—”
“You understand fuck all. Okay? I understand more than you do. You feel guilty. I’m sorry but I can’t help you with that. You think I should understand you had to stay away, and I do. But it doesn’t change how I feel about waiting for you for three and a half fucking years.” Jonah swept a hand down between them. “It’s over. I’m done. Whatever we had, it’s broken. It meant a lot to me at one point, and now it doesn’t. I honestly have no idea what it meant to you, but it no longer matters.”
“It matters to me,” Trey said in a low voice.
Jonah shrugged. “I