Operation Date Escape

nose. “So are you ready to go?”
    No!
    “As ready as I’ll ever be,” she said in resignation, wanting to get this date over with.
    A few minutes later, they were on their way to the Olengtangy Parklands. For what normally would be a short ride, it seemed to go on forever. As did Cornelius’ attempts to impress her with his knowledge of facts and numbers and his financial status. It wasn’t working.
    When they finally reached the park, he practically leapt from the car and raced around to the passenger side to open the door for her.
    At least he was a gentleman.
    “Thank you,” she said. Then her gaze drifted downward. A gentleman in spandex.
    “Something wrong?”
    Her gaze shot up to meet his. “No. I mean yes. What I mean is that I feel like I’m a little overdressed in my jeans.”
    “ Don’t worry about it. There’s no dress code for skating here. Besides, you look great.” He grabbed their skates from the back seat of the freshly washed Acura and closed the door. “Take me for instance. I always wear my running pants when I roller blade. They’re both comfortable and breathable.”
    She wasn’t even going to ask what needed to breathe down there. She already knew. It was the rabbit .
    “Give me your purse,” he said, holding out his hand.
    Her eyes widened. Her mother had set her up with a purse snatcher of all things. “There’s only about ten bucks in there.” Taxi fare.
    “I’m sure it’ll be fine in the trunk while we skate.”
    “In your trunk?”
    “Unless you want to wear it. I just thought it would be easier to skate without it.”
    She breathed a sigh of relief. Her date wasn’t a thief, just a porn star look-alike. She handed her purse over to him. “Good idea.”
    He locked it safely in the trunk of his car and then led her over to an empty park bench where they sat down and changed into their skates. Just her luck, they fit.
    “Do you need help up?” Cornelius asked as he stood and pivoted to face her.
    “No, thanks. I’m fine.”
    But her attempt to get to her feet and remain there proved otherwise. Three seat drops onto the park bench, and one aching ass later, she finally succeeded in remaining upright on her skates.
    “Way to go, Kelsie. Way to go,” her date chanted, loud enough to draw several curious looks from passersby.
    Could the evening get any worse? That question was answered a few minutes later when she pretended to twist her ankle. The fall itself hadn’t been planned, but she used it to her advantage, adding a few moans and groans that would have made any Hollywood actress proud.
    Her date turned and skated back to her. “Are you all right?”
    “ No,” she gasped. “I twisted my ankle.”
    He knelt down beside her with a worried frown and began untying her skate. “Let’s get this off and have a look.”
    She didn’t want his hands on her, but she wanted out of their date more. So she sat holding her breath while Cornelius removed her skate and examined her ‘injured’ ankle.
    “It doesn’t appear to be swelling...”
    “Uh, well, I’m lucky that way. I come from a long line of non-swellers.”
    He looked up at her questioningly.
    “Good genetics,” she explained with a sweet smile. “I’m sure it’ll be fine. I just need to go home and prop it up for a while.”
    “Good genetics or not, I wouldn’t feel right just taking you home without having your ankle checked out first.”
    And that was that. Cornelius helped her back to his car and then grabbed her purse from the trunk, handing it to her.
    That’s what she got for being such a good actress. She’d been so convincing that her date made a bee -line for the emergency room at Riverside Methodist Hospital.
    “Wait here,” he said as they pulled up to the emergency room curb. “I’ll go in and get a wheelchair.”
    The second he disappeared through the emergency room doors, She snatched her cell phone out of her purse and dialed Nanci.
    “Hello?”
    “My mother is soooo dead.”
    “Kelsie?”
    “Yes.”
    “Where are you?”
    She glanced toward the emergency room’s entrance with a frown. “I’m at Riverside Methodist.”
    Her friend gasped. “As in hospital?”
    “Yes.”
    “Oh my God, you really did break a leg!”
    “No. I pretended to sprain my ankle to end the date early. Only Cornelius insisted on bringing me here instead. Now what do I do?”
    “Looks like the only thing you can do is keep on pretending.”
    “Damn, here he comes with a wheelchair.