Picture Perfect

kept waiting for someone to turn me on as much as pictures of Flynn used to, but it never happened. It’s my own fault that I compromised and wound up having sex with someone who sucked in bed. To say it was a big disappointment is an understatement, but I figured I’d come around… hopefully literally.
    I really thought that Lee was a decent guy, but I couldn’t have been more wrong, something I found out in the most humiliating of ways. Six weeks ago, we’d gone to a wedding with a bunch of his friends. The wedding was held in Jersey City, and we’d stayed up there. We rented a series of rooms that were connected, and we all had a great time at the wedding. I’d had a little too great of a time, and when we got back to the hotel room, I started puking. I puked a few times and then fell asleep, waking up a few hours later dehydrated and thirsty as hell. As I was making my way across the room to the mini bar, I’d heard the telltale screams of some loud sex.
    A quick glance around our hotel room indicated that Lee wasn’t there. I don’t remember if I walked to the open door because I was looking for Lee because I was suspicious or not, but what greeted me when I looked through the door was a nightmare. There was literally a pile of bodies on the two queen beds and the floor, all completely naked and engaged in different sexual acts. When my eyes landed on Lee, my jaw dropped. He was flat on his back with his “best friend” Mary sitting on his face and his friend Ben’s wife, Hillary, riding him. It was like a scene from a bad porno movie… or, my worst nightmare.
    What happened after that was a disaster. When I yelled, Mary climbed off Lee’s face so that he could see me. He didn’t bat an eyelash and I struggled not to vomit in disgust at how disrespectful it was that he was looking at me like I was a fucking idiot while his face was covered in Mary’s juices. I fully expected him to apologize, but that didn’t happen. Instead, he yelled at me for interrupting and told me to loosen the fuck up and join in, or keep the stick up my ass and get the fuck out.
    I was mortified. It was embarrassing to be treated that way, and it didn’t help that I heard people laughing when I slammed the door shut. I was packed and out of the room within five minutes, needing to put as much space between me and the deafening sounds of the pile of bodies in the room having wild sex.
    The front desk took my appearance in their stride, and quickly had me checked into a new room. Once I was in the new room I called Jess and woke her up, laying the whole story out for her. We made plans for her to get me the following morning, and once I was off the phone, I curled up in the bed and cried. Not because I was sad about my relationship with Lee coming to an end- in truth that was a relief. I was crying because I was angry and humiliated that I was such a chump that I gave away my virginity to someone who turned out to be the worst kind of person. It killed me that I was so gullible that I’d fallen for what was clearly his charade.
    Unbelievably, Lee called, texted and emailed me pretty steadily for the first few weeks after the break-up, even though I had made it abundantly clear that I would never touch him again.
    He even had the nerve to tell me that it was something he and his friends did all the time and that he’d hoped that by getting me drunk enough I’d loosen up and join in. “I was actually trying to help you. You’re a beautiful girl Tessa, but you’re about as sensual as a Dr. Seuss book. I hoped I could fix that for you.”
    Yeah, talk about a slap in the face. Being told I was a dud on top of everything else made me feel like a giant loser in addition to having shit taste in guys.
    I’d never been very loose around Lee; he was right about that much. Just like every boyfriend I’ve ever had, he didn’t measure up to the sexual feelings that Flynn Rand had evoked in me when my hormones started coming to life. The only difference between Lee and the others was that I was dumb enough to have sex with him.
    My problem had always been Flynn and people not measuring up to how hot I could get just looking at him. I know that Flynn is dangerous to my libido, and I'm going to need to quickly get my shit together and perfect my poker face before I meet him in person. As things stand now, I'd dissolve into a puddle of liquid at his feet and beg him to touch me, just so I could see if the reality was even in the