Silence Of The Hams

changed the subject. “Mike was sure loaded down with luncheons. It’s going well?“
    “Wonderfully well. Except for the raccoons,“ Grace said with a smile. “They dumped all the trash out of the barrels last night. We’re going to have to get something with locked lids.”
    Jane almost mentioned someone getting into Mike’s truck, planning to make a joke about raccoons being smart enough to drive, but decided against it. Conrad had enough on his mind without worrying about neighborhood kids prowling around behind the deli.
    When Jane returned home, Shelley was wrestling her hose and sprinkler around from the back yard to the front. “Are you trying to make it rain?“ Jane asked. “I know where you could get a nice little pamphlet on lawn care.“
    “If that old bastard tries to give me one of his pamphlets, he’ll find it stuck up his nose in seconds,“ Shelley said, bending down and studying the dial setting on the sprinkler. She adjusted it, went back to the faucet, and turned it on. “Where have you been?”
    Jane explained her trip to the deli. “Conrad sent home some dip. Come in and try it while I change my clothes.”
    When she was comfortably clad in jeans and a T-shirt that said, “World’s Greatest Mom,“ she found Shelley sitting on the sofa, making dainty smacking noises with her eyes closed. “Paprika, I think,“ she said, analyzing the dip. “I don’t suppose he told you what the seasonings were.“
    “I didn’t ask. Shelley, it’s a little tense there.“
    “What do you mean?”
    Shelley picked up the little Styrofoam carton of dip and followed Jane to the kitchen, where Jane poured them both a glass of iced tea, then nipped out the back door to pluck some mint leaves to put in it.
    “It’s like Conrad and Grace are having a tug of war with Sarah,“ Jane said. “They both adore her and want what’s best, but they seem to have different ideas of what that is. Conrad treats her like a piece of porcelain that has to be protected from everything—including herself. Grace seems to be more down-to-earth and practical, wanting to let Sarah take care of herself. At least a little bit.“
    “That’s too bad,“ Shelley said. “I’m on Grace’s side, but I can see how it’s awkward. Conrad is her husband, after all, and knows her best. Even Grace admitted that Sarah’s a different person whom she hardly knows anymore. Sarah might be a whole lot more fragile than Grace realizes.“
    “True. And I imagine Grace has thought of that, but it’s awkward for her. It’s always awkward being a fifth wheel anyway.”
    Shelley waited for Jane to go on, and when she didn’t, said, “There’s something else on your mind, too, isn’t there?“
    “That obvious? Okay, this makes me feel like a real traitor, but I’ve been wondering about Grace. That nasty divorce of hers—how long ago was it?“
    “I don’t know. Years and years, I imagine.”
    “Before Stonecipher moved here?”
    Shelley was silent for a few minutes. “I see what you mean. She might have been another client like LeAnne. I’ll have to think about this. I believe it was much longer ago than that, but then I don’t really know when Stonecipher first turned up.“
    “How can we find out?“ Jane asked.
    “Didn’t you say Patsy Mallett was an old friend of Grace’s? She’d know who handled her divorce.“
    “You’re not thinking of just asking her outright, are you? She’d see through what you were getting at in a minute. Patsy’s no dummy.“
    “Jane! Don’t you think I can be subtle?“ Shelley said with a grin.
    “I merely think you’ve met your match in Patsy. But I look forward to watching—at a safe distance.”

17

    Jane was thrilled to discover that Patsy Mallett lived in the messiest house in the world. It wasn’t dirty though. Clean windows, floors, curtains, no used dishes sitting out on the sink. But for sheer numbers of “things“ out and about, Patsy took the prize. There were piles of books and papers everywhere. Tidy piles, but a lot of them. Plastic bags bulged with needlework, model airplanes, electronic kits. There were a dozen different rosters on the -telephone table, half a dozen notepads. Children’s artwork, some yellowed and curling, adorned the front of the refrigerators and the walls. A stack of recipe books was feathered with notes and file cards sticking out every which way.
    Patsy ushered Jane and Shelley into a huge family room with a picnic-sized table in