Bücher online kostenlos Kostenlos Online Lesen
Snuff

Snuff

Titel: Snuff Kostenlos Bücher Online Lesen
Autoren: Terry Pratchett
Vom Netzwerk:
live ones, at least.’
    ‘Thank you very much for your assistance, Mister Slick, and may I congratulate you on having a grandmother with such good grasp of contemporary vocabulary?’ said Carrot.
    There was a delighted shriek from the direction of the dome, the walls of which were very thin.
    ‘Damn right! Granny Slick ain’t so thick!’
    ‘Well, perhaps we have a result,’ said Carrot as they headed back into the city, ‘but, well, I know Ankh-Morpork is a melting pot of a city, but don’t you think it’s rather sad when people come here and forget their ancestry?’
    ‘Yes,’ said Angua, not looking at him. ‘It is.’
    When they were back in Pseudopolis Yard, Carrot summoned Cheery. ‘I’d like you to go and see the tobacconist who gave Sergeant Colon that cigar. Ask him where his tobacco comes from. We know there’s lots of smuggling going on anyway, so he’ll be worried. It might be a nice idea to take along an officer whose mere presence will worry him a little more. Wee Mad Arthur is back from leave.’
    Cheery grinned. ‘In that case, I’ll take him. He worries everybody .’
    Mr Bewilderforce Gumption was having a good day so far. He had been to the bank to deposit the takings and had bought two tickets to the opera. Mrs Gumption would be very pleased about that and certainly more pleased than she was to be called a Gumption. She was always urging him into high society or, at least, high er society, but in some ways the name Gumption always held you back. And now he held open the door to his emporium and saw the policeman sitting patiently in the chair.
    Cheery Littlebottom stood up. ‘Mister Bewilderforce Gumption?’
    He tried to smile. ‘I generally see Fred Colon, officer.’
    ‘Yes. And it’s Sergeant Littlebottom. But strangely enough it’s about Sergeant Colon that I’m visiting you today. Do you remember giving him a cigar?’
    Mr Gumption was suffering from the illusion that many people have that policemen don’t see people lying all the time, so he said, ‘Not as I recall,’ to which Cheery replied, ‘Mister Gumption, it is a well-known fact that Sergeant Colon buys or otherwise procures his tobacco requirements from your noble establishment.’
    Once again Bewilderforce led off on the wrong note. ‘I want to see my lawyer!’
    ‘I’d like to see your lawyer as well, Mister Gumption. Perhaps you’d send someone to collect him while I and my colleague wait here?’
    Bewilderforce looked around bewildered. ‘What colleague?’
    ‘Oh, aye, that’ll be me well enough,’ said the constable known, sometimes briefly, as Wee Mad Arthur, who had been lurking behind a packet of cigarettes.
    Two police officers are far more than doubly worse than one, and Cheery Littlebottom took advantage of the sudden panic to say, carefully, ‘It’s a very simple question, Mister Gumption. Where did that cigar come from?’
    Cheery was aware that Commander Vimes didn’t like the phrase ‘The innocent have nothing to fear’, believing the innocent had everything to fear, mostly from the guilty but in the longer term even more from those who say things like ‘The innocent have nothing to fear’; but Bewilderforce was fearful – she could see him sweating.
    ‘We know you’re a smuggler, Mister Gumption, or perhaps I should say that you take advantage of very good deals when they are, ahem, presented to you. Right now, however, all I need from you is to tell me where that cigar came from. Once you’ve been so kind as to tell me that, we’ll walk out of this building in a happy and cooperative frame of mind.’
    Bewilderforce brightened up. Cheery continued, ‘Of course, other departments of the Watch might wish to visit you in due course. At the moment, sir, you just have to deal with me. Do you know where that batch of cigars came from?’
    Valiantly Bewilderforce tried it on. ‘I buy from dealers all the time,’ he said. ‘It’d take me ages to go through the records!’
    Cheery kept smiling. ‘No problem there, Mister Gumption, I’ll call for my expert colleague Mister A. E. Pessimal right now. I don’t know if you know of him? It’s amazing how quickly he can work through paperwork and I’m sure he’ll find time in his busy schedule to help you out at no cost whatsoever.’
    Five minutes later a grey-faced and breathless Bewilderforce handed Cheery a small scrap of paper.
    Cheery looked up at him. ‘Howondaland? I thought that tobacco mostly came from

Weitere Kostenlose Bücher