The Between Years

who were no doubt as desperate to get homer as I was. Having seen only darkened living rooms and shops, I prayed that my power was still on. Should I have stopped by the grocery store to stock up? I decided that I would be fine and that both of Fort Erie's grocery stores must have been closed. Besides, after such a stressful drive home, I was dying for a hot bath.

    The subdivision I live in is like a maze, which is no treat when all visibility is lost. When I reached my street (thank God) I couldn't even read the street sign. All I saw was a green rectangle suspended in midair. I pulled in through the snow that had already packed onto my driveway, my tires making a ripping noise. If I was going anywhere in the next few days, it sure wasn't going to be in my car, given the weather and that I was down to my last drop of gas. Then I braced myself, stepped out of the car and hugged myself, wishing I'd stocked the trunk with winter clothes in the event of such a disaster.

    My teeth clicked like typewriter keys as I lowered my head to spear through the winter onslaught. My God, I'd never felt so helpless in my life. I thought the weather had literally curled its icy fingers around me and would scoop me up and carry me away. But no way would I let it. Finally, I reached my front door, stomped into the house, and slammed the door. Icy needles stuck to my face as I kicked off my snow-caked shoes and peeled off my fall coat. First, I zipped over to the thermostat to kick the furnace into high gear (the house was no warmer than outside), but I didn't hear the bellow of the furnace kicking on. I tried to switch a lamp on, but I was left in total darkness.

    Goddamn it! I slapped the coffee table. I'd told others how much we take everyday luxuries like electricity for granted all the time, but the storm helped me understand I was equally guilty. Once I realized I was without any of my luxuries-and likely would be for a while, given the state of the town-I nearly burst into tears. Maybe that sounds childish, but it's true.

    I could kiss goodbye the hot bath I'd longed for, but that wasn't what really mattered to me. Randy and Kenny were out in the storm somewhere, probably stranded, and I had to hope to God I could get through to Randy on our cell phones. Randy was supposed to work until five then pick Kenny up from daycare. If Randy were stranded and couldn't pick Kenny up, what would happen?

    I tried his cell phone, but only received his voice mail. I left him a message asking him to leave a message on my phone, since I didn't want to drain my battery waiting for him to call back. I would have been happy knowing that he'd collected Kenny and that they were safe. In the meantime, I balled up on the couch with a blanket over me to keep warm by my only available means.

    I heard nothing. I checked my messages every ten minutes and found an empty inbox. I couldn't help but think they'd become stranded somewhere. And if they were, Kenny would have had no food, no milk, no warm clothes and no fresh diapers.

    At six forty-five, I glanced out the window and saw Randy trudge up the driveway with Kenny in tow. I opened the door for them and slammed it shut the moment they were inside. Randy kissed me, his lips being the first warm thing I'd felt in hours.

    Randy's first words were, “You wouldn't believe how frigging ugly it is out there.”

    A thirty-five minute drive took me an hour and a half to get home,” I said. “And even most of that was trying to drive through town. I'm out of gas too. So yeah, I definitely know how ugly it is out there.”

    Randy kicked his shoes off and threw some warm blankets over Kenny, who hadn't fussed since he'd been inside, thank God for that.

    “ I thought I was going to have to pull over and wait until the weather let up,” I said. “Good thing I didn't. I'd still be waiting!”

    “ I noticed that some people had abandoned their cars altogether. Not worth trying to drive home in this, I guess. Listened to the radio the whole way home too. They're saying the power's out in every home and business in Fort Erie, and all over Buffalo too. And we're the only two towns affected for some reason. Not one town around us has seen a single flake.”

    First, I was reminded of the White's house in Carrie, which had been the only house on its block to be assaulted by a hail of stones. Then my heart sank once I realized we could be stuck like this for days. How had Randy and I become so depended on