The Class Menagerie

in?“
    “Well, it’s this way—you know Edgar North and Gordon Kane?“
    “The men who bought the old Judge Francisco mansion? I’ve met them. Edgar gave me a recipe for—“
    “Those are the ones. They’re turning the mansion into a bed and breakfast. They’ve finally nagged the zoning board into agreeing and the place is almost ready to open for business. So I’m going to open it with my crowd. I’m paying for all of them, so nobody ought to be able to object.“
    Jane poured herself some more coffee and silently waved the pot in front of Shelley, who nodded. “Shelley, I must be getting awfully dim, but I still don’t see a favor looming on the horizon. Sounds to me like you’ve got everything under control—as usual.“
    “This is it, Jane—Edgar and Gordon haven’t got a staff. They hadn’t really planned on opening for a couple weeks—“
    Jane’s eyes opened very wide. “Oh! I get it! You want me to skivvy!“
    “Only breakfast preparation and clean up. And maybe help change bedding. Do a tad of vacuuming. See, Edgar doesn’t want to hire anyone in a desperate hurry just to satisfy my need. He wants to take the time to get just the right person. Naturally, Edgar will do most of the work in the kitchen. He just needs you around to help out a little bit.“
    “Well, housework isn’t my favorite thing, but I do make a mean scrambled egg. Sure, I’ll help. It would only be a couple of hours for a couple of days. I’d say two perms ought to about even it out. Shelley, what a build up. This isn’t nearly as bad as you made me think.“
    “That isn’t the real favor ,“ Shelley said.
    Jane sat her coffee cup down. “Oh?“
    “No, the real favor is, I want you to hang around the rest of the time. To attend with me.“
    “Go to your class reunion! You’ve lost your mind. I didn’t even go to my own!“
    “Yes, but I remember why. You said you’d only been at the school you graduated from for six months and you never knew the people and—“
    “I hate the way you remember everything I tell you. I probably didn’t add this remark at the time: even if I’d known them intimately, I wouldn’t have gone’. I hate the concept of class reunions. Everybody dieting like mad, getting face-lifts and having family pictures taken to show off. I’ve known people who spent the better part of a year before a reunion getting a fake life together to show off.“
    “But you don’t have to fake anything for this. You didn’t know them.“
    “Why in the world would you want me to go to your reunion?“
    “Well, Jane, it’s this way—I was terribly shy in high school—“
    Jane laughed. ‘Try another one. You’re about as shy as Attila the Hun.“
    Shelley’s eyebrows went up. “You didn’t know me then. I was hideously shy. Almost phobic.“
    “Shelley, this is like being told that the Pope used to be an arms dealer. It won’t fly. You can’t possibly expect me to believe this of a woman who has the entire school board, city council, and neighborhood jumping through hoops.“
    Shelley preened a ‘little. “Not exactly through hoops.“
    “So, even if you were shy, what has it got to do with the reunion? You’re not a fading violet anymore.“
    “I think that’s ‘shrinking’ violet. If you’re going to speak in clichés, you ought to get them right.“
    “Don’t be snappish with me. I’ve got the upper hand for a change,“ Jane said with a grin.
    Shelley took a delicate sip of her coffee while she mentally marshaled her forces. “Jane, if you’ve never been to a reunion, this will seem strange to you. But when I went to my tenth, I went striding in with complete confidence and was suddenly overcome by the person I used to be. It’s as if someone pressed a button and I dropped through the floor into a time warp—ten years fell away as if they’d never happened and I was that same stammering twerp I used to be.“
    “You’re kidding!“
    “And I’m afraid it’ll happen again. I need you there, Jane, to constantly remind me what a bossy bitch I really am.“
    “You mean, what a confident, liberated woman you are.“
    Shelley nodded. “Whatever. Anyway, if you’re there helping Edgar and Gordon, it’s a perfect excuse to sort of hang around. And you can be my ‘date’ for the other school stuff, the picnic and the dance.“
    “Why isn’t Paul your date? Husbands are said to be good for that sort of thing.“
    “Paul’s out of town. Out of the