The Resistance

He wanted us to Opt Out, Anna, even though we can’t have children, just to stick two fingers up at the Authorities. It’s the Underground who lied.’
    Anna’s eyes returned to the piece of paper in front of her, then flickered around the room. And then her mouth opened and she let out a moan so loud, so guttural, Peter could hardly believe it was emanating from her.
    ‘No,’ she screamed. ‘No. Please, no. Please . . .’
    Her face was contorted, flushed, and Peter flinched.
    ‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered. ‘I’m as sorry as you are, believe me.’
    But instead of nodding, as he’d hoped, instead of accepting their fate as he had done, Anna pushed back her chair and stood up, her face scornful and her eyes as black as thunder. ‘You’re not sorry,’ she shouted, desperately. ‘You’re pleased. You’ve changed, Peter. You’ve become like them. You want me to sign the Declaration and I won’t. I’ll never sign, Peter, not as long as I live. I won’t . . .’ She stared at him for a few seconds, as if to come up with the right words, her body shaking as she stood in front of him.
    ‘I haven’t changed,’ Peter implored, trying to convince himself as well as her, wondering who was listening to this conversation, what they were thinking. ‘I’ve just seen the light. Be sensible, Anna. You have to. I need you. It’s you and me, together. I can’t do it without you, Anna. Please don’t leave me.’
    ‘You’re the one who’s leaving,’ Anna said, shaking her head at Peter, reinforcing all his self-doubt, all his self-loathing. ‘I won’t ever sign, Peter. I don’t care what you say.’
    As Peter looked at her, he could feel a black, silent rage rising up inside him, because she wouldn’t understand, because of what he was doing to her.
    ‘You know,’ he said, his voice bitter, ‘I’ve never trusted anyone. Not until I met you. And I thought I could depend on you, I really did. But now . . . I should have known you’d let me down in the end too. Thanks, Anna. Thanks for nothing.’
    He looked away from her, couldn’t bear to see the hurt in her eyes. She stood in front of him for seconds, minutes – he wasn’t sure. And then, silently, clutching Ben to her, she left the kitchen and ran up the stairs, slamming the bedroom door behind her.

Chapter Sixteen
    The next day Peter woke feeling unrested, listless. Anna was already up; he could hear her pottering around the kitchen, could hear her chatting to Ben. She sounded so at ease, so comfortable, and yet he knew that the minute he went downstairs the veneer would crack, to be replaced by tension, by anger, by denial. All he’d done was tell her the truth and now he felt betrayed, pushed out, deserted.
    Eventually, he forced himself out of bed, delaying the moment where he’d have to face her by taking a shower, scrubbing himself all over, then getting dressed silently. He had his coat on by the time he walked into the kitchen; the sooner he was out the door, the better.
    Anna looked up and he could see that she had been crying.
    ‘You don’t want breakfast?’ she asked, avoiding his eyes, her voice tinged with reproach.
    He shook his head. ‘I’m running late. Better get to work.’
    Anna nodded and turned back to Ben.
    ‘So I’ll see you later, then,’ Peter said, forcing his eyes away from her.
    ‘OK.’
    She didn’t turn around; Peter shrugged and walked towards the front door, banging it loudly behind him. By the time he arrived at Pincent Pharma, his mood had worsened; it was not improved by the fact that his grandfather was waiting for him in the lab.
    ‘Dr Edwards tells me you’re signing the Declaration.’
    Peter started slightly, then frowned and looked over at Dr Edwards, whose expression was unreadable.
    ‘He did?’ Peter took off his coat and hung it up on a hook, careful not to react, forcing himself not to say anything he’d regret.
    ‘You’ve made the right decision.’
    ‘Turns out I didn’t have much of a choice.’
    His grandfather stared at him levelly for a few seconds. ‘Peter,’ he said, ‘I understand that you came by some information. Something that I was hoping I wouldn’t have to tell you until after you’d signed for the right reasons. I am unclear as to how you came by it. Nevertheless, I think in the circumstances that these issues might be overlooked.’
    ‘Right. Thanks.’
    Peter shot a furtive look at Dr Edwards who was staring at him curiously.
    ‘So you’re definitely