This Girl: A Novel

cancer.”
    I fall onto the couch, but it feels like my heart falls straight through the floor.
    “Will?” Gavin says.
    “I’m here,” I say. “Just get her home, Gavin. She needs to talk to her mom.”
    “Yeah. We’re on our way.”
    •••
    I SPEND THE next several minutes debating whether to go across the street and let Julia know that Layken has misunderstood everything. Unfortunately, by the time I decide to go talk to her, Eddie’s car is pulling into their driveway. I watch as Lake gets out and walks to her front door. When she goes inside, I close my curtains and turn out the light. I wish more than anything I could be there for her right now. I know the heartache she’s about to experience. The fact that I’m a hundred yards away and not able to do a damn thing about it is the hardest thing of all.
    I walk to Caulder’s room and check on the boys. They’re both passed out, so I turn the TV off and shut their door, then head to my room. I can already tell it’s going to be a sleepless night. I can just imagine Lake crying herself to sleep. God, what I wouldn’t give to be able to hold her right now. If I could just take all of this away from her, I would.
    I’m lying with my hands under my head, my eyes focused on nothing in particular. A tear rolls down to my temple and I wipe it away. I’m torn up over the sadness I feel for this girl.
    •••
    IT’S HALF AN hour later when I hear a knock on the living room door. I immediately jump out of bed and run to the living room and swing the door open. She’s standing on my patio, mascara streaked down her cheeks. She’s wiping her eyes with her shirt and she looks up at me. All the things I’ve been willing myself to do for the entire past month get shoved aside by the sheer sadness in her eyes. I put my arm around her and pull her inside, then shut the door behind her. I’m positive she knows the truth about her mom at this point, but I still proceed with caution.
    “Lake, what’s wrong?”
    She tries to catch her breath, sucking in gasps of air between sobs. I can feel her melting, so I wrap my arms around her as she sinks to the floor. I sink with her, then pull her to me and let her cry. I rest my chin on top of her head and stroke her hair while she continues to cry for several minutes. I grasp the back of her shirt and bury my head in the crevice of her neck, fully aware of the fact that she came to me. She needed someone, and she came to me.
    “Tell me what happened,” I finally whisper.
    She begins to sob, so I pull her closer. Between breaths, she says the words that I know are the hardest words she’ll ever have to say. “She’s dying, Will. She has cancer.”
    I know from experience that there are no words comforting enough to follow that. I squeeze her and give her what she needs. Silent reassurance. I pick her up and take her to my bedroom, then lay her on the bed and pull the covers over her. My doorbell rings, so I bend forward and kiss her on the forehead, then head back to the living room.
    I already know it’s Julia before I open the door. When I see her, she looks in just as bad shape as Lake does. “Is she here?” she says through her tears.
    I nudge my head toward my bedroom. “She’s lying down,” I say.
    “Can you get her? She needs to come home so we can talk about this.”
    I glance back toward the hallway and sigh. I don’t want her to go. I know how much she needs this time to absorb everything. I turn back to Julia and take the biggest risk I’ve ever taken in my life.
    “Let her stay, Julia. She needs me right now.”
    Julia doesn’t respond for a moment. The fact that I’m disagreeing with her seems to throw her off for a moment. She shakes her head. “I can’t, Will. I can’t let her stay the night here.”
    “I’ve been in her shoes before. She needs time to absorb this, trust me. Just give her the night to calm down.”
    Julia’s shoulders fall and she looks down, unable to look at me. I don’t know if it’s because she’s angry with me for wanting Lake to stay, or heartbroken because she knows I’m right. She nods, then turns and begins walking back toward her house. Her defeated demeanor makes me feel as though I just broke her heart. She thinks she’s losing Lake to me and that couldn’t be farther from the truth.
    “Julia, wait,” I say, calling after her. She pauses in my front yard and turns to face me. When we make eye contact, she immediately shifts her gaze to the