A Hat Full Of Sky

in witchery, just like everything else. Some years the slightly concertina’d look is in, and you’ll even see the point twisting around so much it’s nearly pointing at the ground. There are varieties even in the most traditional hat (Upright Cone, Black), such as the Countrywoman (inside pockets, waterproof), the Cloudbuster (low-drag coefficient for broomstick use), and, quite importantly, the Safety (guaranteed to survive 80 percent of falling farmhouses).
    Tiffany chose the tallest upright cone. It was more than two feet high and had big stars sewn on it.
    “Ah, the Sky Scraper. Very much your look,” said Zakzak, bustling around and opening drawers. “It’s for the witch on the way up, who knows what she wants and doesn’t care how many frogs it takes, aha. Incidentally, many ladies like a cloak with that. Now, we have the Midnight, pure wool, fine knit, very warm, but”—he gave Tiffany a knowing look—“we currently have very limited supplies of the Zephyr Billow, just in, very rare, black as coal and thin as a shadow. Completely useless for keeping you warm or dry, but it looks fabulous in even the slightest breeze. Observe.”
    He held up the cloak and blew gently. It billowed out almost horizontally, flapping and twisting like a sheet in a gale.
    “Oh, yes ,” breathed Annagramma.
    “I’ll take it,” said Tiffany. “I shall wear it to the Witch Trials on Saturday.”
    “Well, if you win, be sure to tell everyone you bought it here,” said Zakzak.
    “ When I win, I shall tell them I got it at a considerable discount,” said Tiffany.
    “Oh, I don’t do discounts,” said Zakzak, as loftily as a dwarf can manage.
    Tiffany stared at him, then picked up one of the most expensive wands from the display. It glittered.
    “That’s a Number Six,” whispered Annagramma. “Mrs. Earwig has one of those!”
    “I see it’s got runes on it,” said Tiffany, and something about the way she said it made Zakzak go pale.
    “Well, of course ,” said Annagramma. “You’ve got to have runes .”
    “These are in Oggham,” said Tiffany, smiling nastily at Zakzak. “It’s a very ancient language of the dwarfs. Shall I tell you what they say ? They say ‘Oh What a Wally Is Waving This.’”
    “Don’t you take that nasty lying tone with me, young lady!” said the dwarf. “Who’s your mistress? I know your type! Learn one spell and you think you’re Mistress Weatherwax! I’m not standing for this kind of behavior! Brian! ”
    There was a rustling from the bead curtains that led to the back of the shop, and a wizard appeared.
    You could tell he was a wizard. Wizards never want you to have to guess. He had long flowing robes with stars and magical symbols on them; there were even some sequins. His beard would have been long and flowing if indeed he’d been the kind of young man who could really grow a beard. Instead, it was ragged and wispy and not very clean. And the general effect was also spoiled by the fact that he was smoking a cigarette, and had a mug of tea in his hand and a face that looked a bit like something that lives under damp logs.
    The mug was chipped, and on it were the jolly words YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE MAGIC TO WORK HERE BUT IT HELPS !
    “Yeah?” he asked, adding reproachfully, “I was on my tea break, you know.”
    “This young…lady is being awkward,” said Zakzak. “Throwing magic about. Talking back and being smart at me. The usual stuff.”
    Brian looked at Tiffany. She smiled.
    “Brian’s been to Unseen University,” said Zakzak with a “so there” smirk. “Got a degree . What he doesn’t know about magic could fill a book! These ladies need showing the way out, Brian.”
    “Now then, ladies,” said Brian nervously, putting down his mug. “Do what Mr. Stronginthearm says and push off, right? We don’t want trouble, do we? Go on, there’s good kids.”
    “Why do you need a wizard to protect you, with all these magical amulets around the place, Mr. Stronginthearm?” said Tiffany sweetly.
    Zakzak turned to Brian. “What’re you standing there for?” he demanded. “She’s doing it again! I pay you, don’t I? Put a ’fluence on ’em or something!”
    “Well, er…that one could be a bit of an awkward customer…” Brian said, nodding toward Tiffany.
    “If you studied wizardry, Brian, then you know about conservation of mass, don’t you?” she said. “I mean, you know what really happens when you try to turn someone into a