Angels of Darkness

swallowed. “Now, maybe,” he said. “It’s not something I ever noticed before.”
    â€œNow—you mean, since you lost your sight?”
    â€œYes,” he said bitterly, “that’s exactly what I mean.”
    â€œHow did it happen?” I asked. Maybe he decided my tone was curious, rather than rude, because he didn’t seem offended, though he finished another mouthful of food before he answered.
    â€œI was blinded,” he said, “by a thunderbolt from the god’s hand.”
    My eyes opened wide, because that was terribly dramatic. “The god was angry at you? What had you done?”
    He shook his head, chewing again. For someone who claimed to have no appetite, he was tearing through dinner at a rapid clip. “Not angry. There was a prayer for lightning, and he responded with lightning.” The angel took a drink from his water glass. “And destroyed me.”
    My brows drew down. That was a pretty sketchy story. “Were you the one praying for lightning?”
    He shook his head, his expression bleak. He couldn’t see now , but it was clear he was watching some internal vision. “A boy. I was teaching him some of the elemental prayers. How to beg Jovah for rain, how to ask him to stop the rain. How to pray for thunderbolts.”
    I’d never given it any thought, but the entire sky must light up with a dazzling display whenever those particular songs are being taught. “I’m surprised the whole lot of you aren’t blind by now,” I remarked, “with prayers like that on the loose.”
    The angel shook his head again. “We know the risks, and we contain them,” he said. “We know never to sing the whole melodies all the way through. We teach the first half of the prayer, then we work on different songs, then we go back to the plea for lightning. Everyone is always very careful.”
    â€œThen what happened?”
    â€œAaron was young. And confident and careless and curious. Maybe he didn’t believe something as simple as a song could call something as terrible as a thunderbolt. Maybe he was showing off. I don’t know. But he didn’t end the song where he was supposed to. When I realized he was still singing, I ordered him to stop, but he wouldn’t. We were in a small building in Cedar Hills—there were twenty students in the room. I started shouting at all of them to get out, get out, and then I ran back to Aaron, to wrestle him to the ground, to make him stop.” The angel shrugged. “But the prayer was complete. The lightning bolt came. The building was demolished.”
    â€œAnd you were blinded,” I finished. “Did you get injured as well?”
    He nodded. “I have burns across my back and one down the side of my ribs. Scars now, but bad ones at the time.”
    â€œWhat about Aaron?” I asked. “Was he blinded, too?”
    The angel was silent.
    â€œDead, then,” I said with a sigh. “Well, there was a terrible lesson.”
    The angel laid down his fork. “The world is full of terrible lessons,” he said.
    I could hardly argue with that. “When did it happen?”
    â€œTwo years ago.”
    â€œAnd you’ve been here that whole time?”
    He shook his head. “No. I stayed in Cedar Hills—oh, six months. It took that long to heal, to learn how to—” He shook his head again. How to navigate the world as a blind man . “But I found it too painful to be around other angels. So I have moved from place to place, looking for peace.”
    I glanced around the room, full of shadows and regret. “And found it here ?”
    He gave a small bark of laughter. “Hardly. This is just a stop. A quiet place where no one will bother me while I try to think of what to do next.”
    â€œWell, sitting here in solitude all day, doing nothing except thinking about the past, seems like the worst possible way to find peace,” I said.
    â€œYou don’t know anything about it,” he snapped.
    â€œDo you think you’re the only one who’s ever had grief in his life?” I demanded. “Pick five people at random on any street in Samaria, and you’ll find that they’ve suffered at least as much as you have. And most of them are getting on with their lives, not sitting in some dark room and moping.”
    While he had told his story—and I had listened with a certain