Big Breasts & Wipe Hips: A Novel

rabbit sheep would be a new creation. If a sheep can marry a rabbit, a boar can take Ma Ruilian for gestation. With anger in her breast, she told Li Du with detestation. Tolerant Director Li counseled hesitation. These rightists, he said, don’t understand cessation. Little Qiao went to medical school, Yu Zheng uses a newsletter for his narration. Ma Ming studied in the American nation, Zhang Jie’s dictionary is a clarification. Even rightist Wang Meizan, whose head knows no sensation, is a great athlete, cause for celebration …”
    “You there, rightist!” Guo Wenhao shouted. Wang Meizan brought his legs together. “Yo!” he responded. “Load the Qiao girl up with fodder.” Wang replied, “Will do, Leader Guo.”
    Wang Meizan loaded our cart with fodder, as Guo Wenhao asked me over the roar of the pulverizer, “Are you a Shangguan?” “Yes,” I said, “I’m the little Shangguan bastard. “A bastard can become a great man. You Shangguans are an incredible family. Sha Yueliang, Sima Ku, Birdman Han, Speechless Sun, Babbitt. You’re really something …”
    On our way back to the chicken farm with the feed, Qiao Qisha blurted out, “What’s your name?”
    “Shangguan Jintong. Why do you ask?”
    “No reason,” she said. “We work together, so we might as well know each other’s name. How many sisters do you have?” “Eight. No, seven.” “What about the eighth?”
    “She turned traitor,” I replied with annoyance. “That’s all you need to know.”
    Every night the same fox came to harass the chickens, and every other night it stole off with one of the hens. On off nights, it didn’t steal a hen not because it couldn’t, but because it didn’t want to. Its nightly activities fell into two categories: nights when it was hungry, and nights when it merely wanted to cause a disturbance. This drove the women chicken tenders to distraction, and cost them lots of sleep. Commander Long fired at least twenty bullets at the fox, but never harmed a hair of its fur. “That fox is a demon for sure,” one of the women said. “It can recite a charm to ward off bullets.”
    “Nonsense!” a tall woman nicknamed “Wild Mule” disagreed sharply. “No mangy fox can turn into a demon.”
    “If that’s true, how come Commander Long, who was a sharpshooter in the militia, keeps missing?” asked the other woman.
    “I think it’s intentional. The fox is a male, after all,” Wild Mule said salaciously. “Maybe a handsome green visitor comes to her bed late at night, when everything’s quiet.”
    Commander Long stood under the tattered netting silently listening to the women’s talk, fiddling with her pistol, apparently lost in thought. The wanton laughter roused her from her ruminations; tapping her gray cap with the muzzle of the pistol, she strode into the chicken coop, skirting the laying pens, and planted herself in front of Wild Mule, who was gathering eggs. “What did you say just now?” she demanded angrily. “I didn’t say anything,” Wild Mule replied calmly, a brown egg in the palm of her hand. “I heard you!” Commander Long raged as she tapped the wire with her pistol. “Exactly what did you hear?” Wild Mule asked provocatively. Commander Long’s face turned the color of the egg Wild Mule was holding. “I’ll never forgive you for that!” she sputtered as she turned and walked away, enraged. Wild Mule looked at her back and said, “If your heart is pure, not even the devil can scare you! Don’t be fooled by her serious appearance, fox. She’s lusting, all right. The other night, you think I didn’t see with my own eyes?” “Wild Mule,” one of the more prudent women counseled, “that’s enough. Where do you find all this energy on the six ounces of noodles you’re given to eat?” “Six ounces of noodles? Fuck her and her six ounces of noodles!” She pulled a pin out of her hair, poked a hole in each end of the egg she was holding, and quickly sucked it dry. Then she put the outwardly whole egg with the others. “Anyone who wants to report me, go ahead. My dad’s found me a husband in the Northeast, and Fm leaving next month. There are enough potatoes up there to form mountains. How about you, planning on reporting me?” she asked Jintong, who was shoveling chicken droppings by the window. “You’re the most likely one, a fragrant baby rooster, just the type favored by our armless leader. An old cow like her, with bad teeth, has to graze on tender