Big Breasts & Wipe Hips: A Novel

the bath, wrinkles and a few dark freckles showed on her face. When she closed her eyes to keep out the smoke, crow’s feet fanned out in the corners. “I’ve never seen a more innocent man in my life,” she said with a squint. “Am I just an ugly old hag?”
    Unable to bear the penetrating glare that squeezed out from her slitted eyes, he lowered his head and laid his hands on his knees. “No,” he said, “you’re not old, and you’re not ugly. You’re the most beautiful woman in the world.”
    “I thought your mother was lying to me,” she said, sounding demoralized. “But I see it was true, every bit of it.” She stubbed her cigarette out in an ashtray and sat up. “The incident with that woman, did it really happen?” He stretched his neck, unused to being confined by a starched collar and a tie; his face was sweaty. As he rubbed his knees, he felt he was on the verge of crying.
    “That’s all right,” she said. “I was just asking. You’re such a little idiot.”
    At noon, a dozen or so men in Western suits and leather shoes joined them for lunch. Holding his hand, she introduced him to her guests. “This is my adoptive son. Looks like a movie star, doesn’t he?” The men gazed at him with their clever eyes. One of them, a man with slicked-down hair and wearing a gold Rolex, the band intentionally loose around his wrist, said with a salacious wink, “Old Jin, you’re an old cow feasting on tender new grass!” Jintong recalled that Old Jin had introduced this middle-aged man as the chairman of some commission or other.
    “Up your mother’s ass!” Old Jin swore. “This son of mine is the Golden Boy at the feet of the Queen Mother of the West, a gentleman in every respect. Not like you horny dogs. You’re attracted to women like mosquitoes are drawn to blood. You’ll sink your teeth into them even if you get swatted flat in the process.”
    ‘Old Jin,” a bald man piped up, “you’re the one we want to sink our teeth into.” His jowls flapped when he talked, so badly he often had to cup his hands around his cheeks to keep his mouth from twisting out of shape. “Such tasty flesh!”
    “Old Jin, you’re taking a page out of Empress Wu’s book,” said a husky young man with naturally wavy hair and eyes like a goldfish. “You’ve got yourself a little pretty boy!”
    “You all have your second and third wives, but I can’t…” Old Jin stopped short. “Just shut your foul mouths. If you don’t watch out, I’ll make sure people find out about all your sneaking around.”
    A heavy-browed, hollow-cheeked man held out his wineglass and walked up to Jintong. “Elder brother Shangguan Jintong, here’s to you and your release from the camp.”
    Now that his secret was out, Jintong felt like crawling under the table.
    “He was framed!” Old Jin shouted indignantly. “Jintong is an honest man who would never do what he was charged with.”
    The men began whispering among themselves. Then they stood up and, one after the other, toasted Jintong. Since he’d never drunk alcohol before, it took little to set his head spinning. The men’s faces took on the appearance of sunflowers waving in the wind, and he had the baffling feeling that he ought to clear something up with these people. He held out his cup and said, “I did it… with her, but her body was still warm … eyes still open … she smiled …”
    “Now that’s a real man!” he heard one of the sunflowers say, which made him feel better, just before he fell facedown into the food on the table.
    He awoke to find himself stark naked on Old Jin’s bed. She was there beside him, also naked, leaning against the comforter, a glass of wine in her hand; she was watching a video. It was the first color TV Jintong had ever seen — at the camp he’d seen a tiny bit of TV on a black-and-white set, which was astonishing enough, but the color picture had him doubting his own eyes. Especially since a naked man and woman were cavorting right there on the screen. Feelings of guilt weighed his head down. He heard Old Jin giggle. “You can stop pretending, son. Raise your head and take a good look. You need to see how people do it.” Jintong raised his head and stole another look or two. Chills ran up and down his spine.
    Old Jin leaned over and switched off the video. White dots filled the screen until she turned off the TV. When she adjusted the bedside lamp, a soft yellow light painted the walls. The light blue window